The Psychology of Relationships

Ever feel like you keep ending up with the same “type” of partner even when it hasn’t worked out before? You might be unconsciously choosing the wrong people and repeating patterns that keep you stuck. Julie & Yue are joined by Marc Sholes, Psychotherapist and author of Reset Your Romantic GPS, to explore why we’re drawn to familiar but unfulfilling partner types. He explains the ways attachment styles influence our choices, why awareness can help you break the cycle, and how to distinguish a rough patch from true incompatibility—so you can make healthier, more fulfilling relationship choices.
In this episode, you’ll learn:
 • Why you keep choosing the same “type” of partner
 • How attachment styles shape your patterns
 • Signs a relationship is worth working through versus letting go
 • Practical strategies to identify triggers and subconscious tendencies
 • How to make choices that lead to healthier, more aligned relationships
To learn more about Marc Sholes, follow him @marcsholes and visit https://marcsholeslcsw.com/

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Early experiences quietly shape how we attach, communicate, and handle conflict in adult relationships—without us even realizing it. In this episode, Vienna Pharaon, marriage and family therapist and author of The Origins of You, explores the five core childhood wounds many carry into adulthood. She explains how these wounds can appear as avoidance, people-pleasing, fear of abandonment, or staying stuck in unhealthy patterns—and why they were protective strategies, not flaws. Vienna also shares practical tools to heal these patterns so your past informs you without defining your future.
In this episode, you’ll learn:
 • The five core childhood wounds and how they show up in relationships
• Why early protective strategies can later limit intimacy
 • How attachment styles, emotional triggers, and beliefs about love are formed
 • Tools for identifying the narratives driving your relationship choices
 • How to heal old patterns to build healthier, more connected relationships
To learn more about Vienna Pharaon, follow @mindfulmft and visit https://viennapharaon.com/ 

Want to feel more connected to your partner? Download Brick and get 10% off at https://www.getbrick.app/PORSHOW

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Strong, lasting relationships aren’t just about chemistry or shared interests—they’re about how we relate to each other every day. Julie & Yue sit down with Dr. Adam Bandelli, psychologist and relational intelligence expert, to dive into why relational intelligence is essential for deep, meaningful connections. He shows how tuning into your partner’s emotions, responding with empathy, and communicating with intention can deepen trust, create emotional safety, and help your relationship grow stronger over time. Dr. Bandelli also breaks down the five core skills of relational intelligence, showing why empathy, attunement, and rapport impact the relationship from its early stages to months and decades in. 
In this episode, you’ll learn:
 • What Relational Intelligence is and why it matters
• The five essential skills for building trust and connection
 • Why empathy and attunement matter more than chemistry
 • How relational intelligence strengthens intimacy
 • Ways to make your relationship more resilient
To learn more about Dr. Adam Bandelli, follow him @adambandelli and visit https://bandelliandassociates.com

Want to feel more connected to your partner? Download Brick and get 10% off at https://www.getbrick.app/PORSHOW

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For decades, the 5 Love Languages have shaped how we understand connection—but relationships, culture, and expectations have evolved, and our framework for love might need an update. In this episode, Molly Owens, CEO and founder of Truity, introduces the 7 Love Styles, a modern evolution of how we give and receive love. She explains why love languages still resonate, where they fall short today, and how these updated styles reflect changes in identity, communication, and partnership dynamics. Molly explains what your love style reveals about your relational strengths and areas for growth—and how that awareness can transform the way you show up in relationships, both new and long-term.
In this episode, you’ll learn:
 • Why love languages still matter – and what they miss today
• How the 7 Love Styles reflect modern relationship dynamics
 • The connection between love styles and attachment, personality, and emotional patterns
 • How misreading love styles creates friction and disconnection
 • How awareness of your style (and your partners) can deepen communication and intimacy
To learn more about Truity, follow @truitylabs and take the assessment at https://www.truity.com/test/love-styles-test

Want to feel more connected to your partner? Download Brick and get 10% off at https://www.getbrick.app/PORSHOW

Our Sponsors:
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With marriage rates on the decline, do people still want to get married—and why does it still carry so much emotional and cultural weight? In this episode, Julie & Yue sit down with Allison Raskin, mental health advocate, relationship coach, and author of I Do. I Think?: Conversations About Modern Marriage, to unpack what marriage looks like today, how societal pressures shape our choices, and why committing can feel both deeply personal and overwhelming. She shares her own journey from a broken engagement to marrying her now-husband along with practical guidance on navigating differing timelines, managing fear, and clarifying what you truly want versus what you’ve been told to want.
In this episode, you’ll learn:
 • Why marriage continues to hold emotional and cultural significance today
• How societal expectations influence your decisions about commitment
 • Strategies for navigating differing timelines or desires around marriage
 • How to separate what you truly want from external pressures
 • Ways to approach commitment with clarity, confidence, and intention

To learn more about Allison Raskin, follow her @allisonraskin and visit https://www.allisonraskin.com/

Want to feel more connected to your partner? Download Brick and get 10% off at https://www.getbrick.app/PORSHOW

Our Sponsors:
* Get Behind Closed Doors wherever books are sold or at Kensington Publishing https://www.kensingtonbooks.com
* Quince: Get free shipping and 365 day returns at https://quince.com/POR
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