Chine McDonald
Good morning,
This week, Wendy Dalrymple, Canon Pastor at Ripon Cathedral, shared on social media her experience of being in an abusive relationship when she was young. Like many other women who face violence at the hands of men they know, she was locked in a cycle of abuse, followed by remorse, followed by forgiveness, followed by more abuse. The relationship only ended when her then boyfriend assaulted her in a public place and onlookers intervened, telling him to stop, and calling the police.
We’re in the middle of the UN’s 16 Days of Activism to end gender-based violence, which highlights the bleak reality that one in three women experience some sort of abuse in their lifetime. To raise awareness, Ripon Cathedral’s Leave Her Alone exhibition showcases art created by male prisoners, many of whom have been perpetrators of violence against women. It hopes to encourage all to speak out, drawing on the words of Jesus who told his disciples to leave the woman who anointed his feet alone.
But speaking out – intervening when we know or see someone is being abused - is easier said than done. Our instincts may push us towards self-protection and self-preservation.
This week, Farah Naz, the aunt of murdered law graduate Zara Aleena called for a new law that would require bystanders to step in when they see people in danger. Her calls followed the publication of a report by Lady Elish Angiolini into the prevention of sexually motivated crimes against women in public. Among the recommendations – which come four years after the rape and murder of Sarah Everard – was one suggesting the government implement a so-called Good Samaritan law.
Speaking on the Today programme earlier this week, she said such a law, requiring people to step in if they can reasonably help someone in danger, would create a culture change, and encourage us all to see the safety of women in public as a “whole society action”.
Whether or not a Good Samaritan law will or even could be implemented is one thing, but I think a society in which we notice and try to help others in need, even against our own interests, is the kind of idea at the heart of the Christian story.
Drawing on the parable of the Good Samaritan, Martin Luther King – in a speech the day before he was killed – pointed out that it’s reasonable to ask when confronted with another in need: “If I stop to help… what will happen to me?” But for King, the motivating question for the Good Samaritan is instead: “If I don’t stop to help this person, what will happen to them [him]?”
Perhaps this motivating question can help us to recognise that – when it comes to the scourge of violence against women in our societies – we are all our sisters’ keepers.