Bloodline Banter

Welcome back to Bloodline Banter! This week, we’re coming in hot after scrapping an entire episode, and apparently that was all it took for us to completely lose the plot.

We start with Landon preparing for a potential trip to jail over a forgotten ticket—mugshot merch, wanted posters, and a bail-out plan already in the works—only to find out the whole crisis could be solved with $200. From there, Riley has officially joined the Tesla cult, soup season is threatening every ounce of weight-loss progress we’ve made, and one trip to Walmart sends us into a full-blown discussion about children running wild and the way we were raised.

Somehow we also find time to discuss Sydney Sweeney, why Sonic needs to bring back roller-skating carhops and the two-guys-in-a-car commercials, our lifelong dreams of Dancing with the Stars, terrible car names, why sprinkles ruin perfectly good desserts, and the absolute chokehold Southern injury-lawyer billboards have on the interstate.

Then we get into cheaters, liars, karma, tables that always turn, people who have officially exhausted every ounce of our patience, scared drivers, Riley’s introduction to interstate driving, and why Todd Chrisley may be one of the greatest trash-talkers to ever walk the earth.

Basically, if you’ve ever forgotten something important, hated a sprinkle, panicked while merging onto the interstate, waited patiently for karma to do its job, or realized halfway through a conversation that you have absolutely no idea how you got there… this episode is for you.

Remember to Submit all stories, questions, and shenanigans to be featured on Cousin Counsel at team@bloodlinebanterofficial.com.

 

Thank you to these sponsors:

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off your first order.

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Cowboy Colostrum: Use code BANTER at checkout for 25% off your entire order or visit http://cowboycolostrum.com/banter.

 

LET'S GET SOCIAL:

Bloodline Banter:

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/bloodlinebanterofficial/

TikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@bloodlinebanterofficial/

Snapchat - https://www.snapchat.com/@bloodlinebanter

Apple Podcasts -  https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/bloodline-banter/id1869700162

Email - team@bloodlinebanterofficial.com

 

Landon Mauk:

Snapchat - https://www.snapchat.com/Landonmauk

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/itslandonmauk/

TikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/Landon.mauk

Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/landonmauk/

 

Riley Mitchell:

Snapchat - https://www.snapchat.com/@rileygmitchell3

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/realrileymitchell/

TikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@rileygmitchell

Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61562003576933

YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@realrileymitchell

Welcome back to Bloodline Banter! This week, the one and only Danae Hays is joining us, and buckle the hell up because this one goes everywhere

Danae takes us back to her small-town Alabama roots, tells us how the legendary Sharon Jean came to life, and explains why her girlfriend Jen is still trying to make sense of Southern phrases like “used to could” and “tumped it over.” We get into growing up in the South, homemade banana pudding, college softball, one unforgettable trip to church that somehow involves Nick Saban, and why Milo’s sweet tea apparently has powers nobody warned us about.

From there, the conversation goes completely off the rails. We swap some of our most ridiculous Southern stories and somehow end up talking about horse energy healers, hallucinations, Ambien nightmares, questionable million-dollar inventions, Southern church culture, Dolly Parton, Willie Nelson, and a breakfast strip club that absolutely nobody asked for.

Basically, put three Southerners in a room with microphones and eventually somebody’s going to say something that probably shouldn’t leave the room.

If you’ve ever said something that makes perfect sense in the South but sounds absolutely insane everywhere else, this episode is for you.

Remember to Submit all stories, questions, and shenanigans to be featured on Cousin Counsel at: team@bloodlinebanterofficial.com.

 

Thank you to these sponsors:

Cowboy Colostrum: Use code BANTER at checkout for 25% off your entire order or visit http://cowboycolostrum.com/banter.

Olive App: Go to www.oliveapp.com/banter and use code BANTER for 50% off all memberships.Remi: Go to http://shopremi.com/BANTER and use code

BANTER at checkout for 55% off with Remi Club Subscribe & Save until the end of August

Cure Hydration: Go to http://curehydration.com/BANTER and get 20% off your first order with promo code BANTER

 

LET'S GET SOCIAL:

Bloodline Banter:

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/bloodlinebanterofficial/

TikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@bloodlinebanterofficial/

Snapchat - https://www.snapchat.com/@bloodlinebanter

Apple Podcasts -  https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/bloodline-banter/id1869700162

Email - team@bloodlinebanterofficial.com

 

Landon Mauk:

Snapchat - https://www.snapchat.com/Landonmauk

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/itslandonmauk/

TikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/Landon.mauk

Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/landonmauk/

 

Riley Mitchell:

Snapchat - https://www.snapchat.com/@rileygmitchell3

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/realrileymitchell/

TikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@rileygmitchell

Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61562003576933

YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@realrileymitchell

 

Danae Hays:

Tiktok -  https://www.tiktok.com/@danaehays

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/danae.hays

Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/danaehayscomedy

Website - http://www.danaehays.com

Welcome back to Bloodline Banter! This week, our best friend Kiersten joins us for an episode that goes completely off the rails — and casually drops the news that she’s leaving Nashville and moving back to Texas.

Before we can properly mourn the friendship, we have bigger problems to address: apparently she doesn’t like sweet tea, cornbread, collard greens OR chicken casserole, so naturally her entire Southern identity comes into question. We recap church homecoming, the mountain of casseroles that got us through the service, our night at the Grand Ole Opry, and the absolutely miserable Texas trip that ended with a 4:30 a.m. airport run, somebody throwing up and somebody else desperately needing a bathroom.

Kirsten also gives her uncensored assessment of our personalities, joins us for Bloodline Brain Check, and takes a seat on the bench for Cousin Counsel — where fake friends and one absolutely unhinged monster-in-law are brought before the court.

If you’ve ever gone to church for the potluck, questioned somebody’s Southern credentials, survived a trip with your best friends, or had an in-law who desperately needed to mind their own damn business, this episode is for you.

Thank you to these sponsors:

Cowboy Colostrum: Use code BANTER at checkout for 25% off your entire order or visit http://cowboycolostrum.com/banter.

Olive App: Go to www.oliveapp.com/banter and use code BANTER for 50% off all memberships.

Amble Health:  Curious about NAD+ therapy? Learn more through a convenient online consultation with a licensed healthcare provider. If prescribed, treatment is shipped directly to your door. Visit joinamble.com (https://joinamble.com/) to see if NAD+ therapy may be right for you.

ZBiotics: Go to ziotics.com/banter and use code BANTER for 15% off your order.

LET'S GET SOCIAL:

Bloodline Banter:

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/bloodlinebanterofficial/

TikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@bloodlinebanterofficial/

Snapchat - https://www.snapchat.com/@bloodlinebanter

Apple Podcasts -  https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/bloodline-banter/id1869700162

Email - team@bloodlinebanterofficial.com

Landon Mauk:

Snapchat - https://www.snapchat.com/Landonmauk

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/itslandonmauk/

TikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/Landon.mauk

Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/landonmauk/

Riley Mitchell:

Snapchat - https://www.snapchat.com/@rileygmitchell3

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/realrileymitchell/

TikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@rileygmitchell

Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61562003576933

YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@realrileymitchell

Kiersten Newman:

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/kierstennewman_?utm_source=qr

Amazon Storefront - http://amazon.com/shop/thetravelingtrendsetter

Tiktok - https://www.tiktok.com/@kierstennewman_?_r=1&_t=ZT-99P8wONXcVB

Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/kierstennewmann?mibextid=wwXIfr&rdid=Y71jTAgO1VEhbXzV&share_url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.facebook.com%2Fshare%2F1PGywV7HGS%2F%3Fmibextid%3DwwXIfr

Welcome back to Bloodline Banter, where absolutely nothing was planned and somehow everything became a topic. This week, we’re bouncing from why the Smoky Mountains are basically Vegas for Baptists and the absolute robbery happening at the gas pump, to childhood reading logs, school lunches, cartoons, fast-food burger rankings, and why nobody has 35 minutes to caramelize an onion.

 

We also get into Walmart refusing to accept Apple Pay, questionable childhood punishments, pronunciation crimes at Mexican restaurants, self-care days, and the very real problem of having to behave in public because apparently people actually recognize us now. And, naturally, the episode ends with a story involving a bar, a Grimace Bomb, and the possibility that Landon got thrown up on.

 

If you’ve ever lied on a summer reading log, considered a horse and buggy because gas is too damn expensive, or realized halfway through a story that maybe it shouldn’t be told publicly… this episode is for you.    

 

Thank you to these sponsors:

 

Olive App: Go to www.oliveapp.com/banter and use code BANTER for a 7-day free trial plus 50% off your annual membership.

Cowboy Colostrum: Use code BANTER at checkout for 25% off your entire order or visit http://cowboycolostrum.com/banter.

Füm: Visit https://tryfum.com/bloodline (https://www.youtube.com/redirect?event=video_description&redir_token=QUFFLUhqa1FKM3Q5RUtuaTlKWFhtR2l2UU5JLU96RlRNUXxBQ3Jtc0trQTdpcm5oVVZLYjA3UU5YbEpuTGlOOXV1YmZaVDZOVDhhcVRWVUFIYnBNR3hNTUdPcUlGR01BTjJVem9xT0xicUFvcUpJcTl1a2ltLWRpb1VMQXRnVHl0YzBtZU5ocTkzSVhwMlpfTDNGZXkyS2I5Zw&q=https%3A%2F%2Ftryfum.com%2Fbloodline&v=mmd16scynO8) and use code BLOODLINE to receive a free gift with your Journey Pack.

 

 

 

LET'S GET SOCIAL:

 

Bloodline Banter:

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/bloodlinebanterofficial/

TikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@bloodlinebanterofficial/

Snapchat - https://www.snapchat.com/@bloodlinebanter

Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/bloodline-banter/id1869700162

Email - team@bloodlinebanterofficial.com

 

Landon Mauk:

Snapchat - https://www.snapchat.com/Landonmauk

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/itslandonmauk/

TikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/Landon.mauk

Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/landonmauk/

 

Riley Mitchell:

Snapchat - https://www.snapchat.com/@rileygmitchell3

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/realrileymitchell/

TikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@rileygmitchell

Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61562003576933

YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@realrileymitchell

Welcome back to Bloodline Banter! This week, we’re running on no sleep after spending nearly 24 hours at the hospital waiting on Landon’s sister to have her baby—and somehow eating our way through half of Chattanooga in the process. We recap the chaos of the waiting room, the birth, and everything that happened during one very long day.

Then we get into grandparents feeding squirrels biscuits, people from our hometown who cannot stay out of jail, the absolute scam that is adulthood, our distrust of bathroom locks, and why doing laundry might be one of the worst household chores ever invented. We also take a turn into true crime and share our very unqualified opinions, theories, and questions about the Lindsay Clancy trial before putting our remaining brain cells through another round of Bloodline Brain Check.

If you’ve ever spent an entire day waiting on a baby, eaten your feelings out of boredom, stalked your hometown mugshot page, questioned every decision you’ve made since becoming an adult, or avoided a pile of laundry like your life depended on it… this episode is for you.

Remember to Submit all stories, questions, and shenanigans to be featured on Cousin Counsel at team@bloodlinebanterofficial.com.

Thank you to these sponsors:

Olive App:

Go to www.oliveapp.com/banter and use code BANTER for a 7-day free trial plus 50% off your annual membership.

Cowboy Colostrum: Use code BANTER at checkout for 25% off your entire order or visit http://cowboycolostrum.com/banter.

Rock The Country: Get your tickets for Ocala on 8/28 and 8/29 today at http://rockthecountry.com to see Brooks & Dunn, Jon Pardi, Lauren Alaina, Blake Shelton and more!

LET'S GET SOCIAL:

Bloodline Banter:

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/bloodlinebanterofficial/

TikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@bloodlinebanterofficial/

Snapchat - https://www.snapchat.com/@bloodlinebanter

Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/bloodline-banter/id1869700162

Email - mailto:team@bloodlinebanterofficial.com

Landon Mauk:

Snapchat - https://www.snapchat.com/Landonmauk

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/itslandonmauk/

TikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/Landon.mauk

Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/landonmauk/

Riley Mitchell:

Snapchat - https://www.snapchat.com/@rileygmitchell3

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/realrileymitchell/

TikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@rileygmitchell

Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61562003576933

YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@realrileymitchell