Faith & Feelings

There comes a moment in many of our lives when we begin to notice that the way we love has been shaped by pain we haven’t fully tended to. Old wounds resurface, familiar patterns repeat, and our unhealed places begin to influence how we show up in relationships.

In this conversation with spiritual director Barb Boatner, we explore how healing changes the way we love. Barb talks about learning to love from a place of presence rather than self-protection, and how pain doesn’t disappear when it’s avoided, but often leaks out sideways -- impacting those closest to us. She also shares why healing is not peripheral to faith, but central to spiritual formation.

Together, we reflect on how healing opens us to deeper connection: with God, with others, and with the people we love. I hope you'll listen in.

Thought-provoking quotes:

“The way we love is shaped either by our wounds or by our healing.” - Barb Boatner

"Curiosity instead of judgment changes everything.” - Barb Boatner

“I can’t change what happened to me. But I can change how I relate to it. Healing is learning to stay with myself in kindness." - Barb Boatner

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Key words:

healing journey, befriending yourself, self compassion, curiosity, self awareness, emotional wounds, emotional regulation, spiritual formation, wisdom, spiritual integration, spiritual maturity, emotional health, personal growth, spiritual director, Barb Boatner

We live in a world that rewards speed, productivity, and quick fixes, but healing doesn’t move at that pace. The soul speaks a different language. One that is slower, messier, and far more courageous.

In this episode, we explore what it actually means to begin the healing journey — not as a linear path toward improvement, but as a winding, nonlinear process we return to again and again. Drawing from clinical experience and personal reflection, I explore four common internal responses that often arise when healing begins to stir: “It’s too hard.” “It’s not necessary.” “I don’t know how.” “It’s not possible for me.”

Rather than obstacles, these responses are compassionate entry points. Places shaped by survival, pain, and longing. This episode invites a gentler posture toward yourself and toward God: not having to be ready, but simply willing.

Thought-provoking questions:

“Healing is far messier and far more complicated than we expect. It’s nonlinear. It isn’t a single moment of breakthrough, but a spiraling journey we return to again and again throughout our lives.” - Taylor Joy Murray

“Real change only happens when we are willing to go the long way round—a longer, more arduous, more inward, and more prayerful route.” - Sue Monk Kidd

“More often than not, I’m learning that God’s presence in healing looks less like a Rescuer and more like a Midwife.” - Taylor Joy Murray

Get Faith & Feeling's weekly resource email

Watch this episode on YouTube

Grab a copy of my book Stop Saying I'm Fine

Connect with me on my website

Find me on Instagram @__taylorjoy__

Key words:

healing journey, befriending yourself, self compassion, curiosity, self awareness, emotional wounds, emotional regulation, spiritual formation, wisdom, spiritual integration, spiritual maturity, emotional health, personal growth

There comes a moment in many of our lives when the idea of “healing” starts to feel confusing — or even exhausting. The word we’ve heard so often begins to lose its meaning. And the hope that we’ll one day arrive at a version of ourselves that no longer hurts starts to feel out of reach.

In this episode of our new series, Why Does My Healing Matter?, we explore what healing looks like when it isn’t a destination to achieve, but a relationship to tend. We talk about the difference between fixing what’s broken and befriending the parts of ourselves shaped by pain—and why the healing we avoid is often what shows up most in our relationships. Listen in.

Thought-provoking quotes:

“Healing is the most selfless thing you can ever do for the people you love.” - Dan Allender

“When we don’t tend to our own wounds, we unconsciously ask the people we love to carry the weight of them.” - Taylor Joy Murray

“Healing isn’t about arriving at a version of yourself that no longer hurts. It’s about becoming a compassionate witness to the version of you that does.” - Taylor Joy Murray

Get Faith & Feeling's weekly resource email

Watch this episode on YouTube

Grab a copy of my book Stop Saying I'm Fine

Connect with me on my website

Find me on Instagram @__taylorjoy__

Key words:

healing journey, befriending yourself, self compassion, curiosity, self awareness, emotional wounds, emotional regulation, spiritual formation, wisdom, spiritual integration, spiritual maturity, emotional health, personal growth

In this episode, I invite us into a guided time of imaginative prayer — a contemplative practice rooted in the early church mothers and fathers that helps us encounter God in a personal, embodied way.

Together, we step into the Garden of Gethsemane with Jesus on the night before His crucifixion. As we enter this scene, we slow down, engage our senses, and notice what stirs within us as we witness Jesus’ honesty, sorrow, and surrender before the Father. I hope you'll join me as we walk onto the scene of Matthew 26:36-42 and ask the Spirit to speak to us through this story.

Get Faith & Feeling's weekly resource email

Watch this episode on YouTube

Grab a copy of my book Stop Saying I'm Fine

Connect with me on my website

Find me on Instagram @__taylorjoy__

Key words:

healing journey, befriending yourself, self compassion, curiosity, self awareness, emotional wounds, emotional regulation, spiritual formation, wisdom, spiritual integration, spiritual maturity, emotional health, personal growth

There’s a question I hear often — both in the therapy room and in conversations about faith: Why does my healing matter? Why does change feel so hard, and sometimes even unnecessary?

This week on Faith & Feelings, I invite us to explore why healing isn’t separate from spiritual formation, but one of the primary ways God’s transforming work takes shape in us. Together, we’ll reflect on how healing shapes who we’re becoming, expands our capacity for love, and changes how we show up in our relationships.

This trailer introduces our next series, “Why Does My Healing Matter?”, and invites us to get curious about our own inner lives — not as a self-improvement project, but as a response to God’s ongoing work within us.

Thought-provoking quotes:

“We do this work to become fierce, tender lovers of God, others, and ourselves.” - Mary Ellen Owen

“When we tend to our own healing, we stop unconsciously asking others to carry the weight of our unresolved pain.” - Taylor Joy Murray

"Inner work and healing are not distractions from sanctification. They are the very places where God’s redemptive work becomes concrete, relational, and embodied.” - Taylor Joy Murray

Get Faith & Feeling's weekly resource email

Watch this episode on YouTube

Grab a copy of my book Stop Saying I'm Fine

Connect with me on my website

Find me on Instagram @__taylorjoy__

Key words:

Spiritual formation, healing, vulnerability, listening, creativity, emotions, curiosity, presence, process, courage, self-awareness, emotional health, personal growth, hope, connection, community, relationships