Brain First Parenting with Eileen Devine

• Ep. 14 | A Dad's Perspective w/ Special Guest Dave Devine

  SUMMARY - In this episode of the Brain First Parenting podcast, Eileen sits down with a very special guest, her husband of 20+ years, Dave Devine. Eileen & Dave have a conversation about what it's been like for Dave, in his role as a father to his now teenage daughter who lives with FASD, a serious neurobehavioral condition, to shift his lens over the years to a Brain First lens.TAKEAWAYS:The experience of dads are often overlooked in the parenting spaces, leaving a gap in support which can lead to feelings of isolation and hopelessness for these fathers. Their experience is unique and deserves unique support.Dave shares memories of feeling inadequate and ineffective as a dad, especially early on when he began to realize his daughter's development was not "on track".Stepping away from a behavioral lens and shifting to a Brain First lens was possible with education and support, over time.The question, "What do you need from me, to be a good parent to you?" as been helpful for Dave as he works to parent two kids who have drastically different needs.Curiosity and openness is at the heart of finding success, joy, and delight in this parenting experience, specifically the father experience. It takes practice to cultivate this as the dad of a child with a serious neurobehavioral condition.The steepest part of the learning curve for Dave has been to remember that his daughter has an invisible, brain-based difference, especially when her behavioral symptoms are acute.Deeply-held beliefs and values will clash with your kid's behavioral symptoms. Getting clarity on where and why this is happening is important in order to parent from a Brain First lens.We discuss why connection and relationship has become the highest priority for Dave (in relation to his kids) vs behavioral complianceRESOURCES:Join the waitlist for the Focus on Father Program! 2025 cohort is opening for registration soon!Blog Post: Dads Need Support, Too: Three Ways That Fathers Raising Neurodiverse Kids Struggle, and One Thing They Can Do=======================If you appreciated this episode, and would like to receive a weekly note from Eileen about the Brain First Parenting journey every Monday, you can subscribe to her free newsletter HERE!You can also check out all the FREE resources Eileen offers for parents, and learn more about all things Brain First at her website: eileendevine.comAnd of course, find and follow Eileen on social media:FacebookInstagramPinterest

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• Ep. 13 | 8 Assumptions We Make About Kids with Brain Differences

  SUMMARY - In this newest episode, Eileen highlights a trap that is common for parents, teachers, and providers to fall into when supporting with kids and teens who have brain-based differences and challenging behaviors. This trap is making assumptions, often without even realizing it, about what that child or teen's brain can do and not factoring in their lagging cognitive skills and how this impacts that specific situation. In this episode, Eileen gives 8 examples of common assumptions made about kids with brain-based differences and provides a free downloadable infographic to accompany this episode. See details on how to access that infographic below.TAKEAWAYS:Learning about the brain, what it does, and how it functions helps us gain a better understanding of what this means for individuals with brains that work differently.Learning about this also makes us (parents, teachers and providers) less susceptible to making assumptions about others' brains and how they work.The goal, when supporting kids with brain-based differences, is to recognize when we are making assumptions about their brain and cognitive skills so we can pause and assess as to whether or not this is true for that individual.Examples of common assumptions society makes about brains and how this compares to what we know about those living with neurobehavioral differences.RESOURCES:FREE downloadable handout: 10 Assumptions We Make About How All Brains FunctionUnderstanding the Window of Tolerance (blog post)=======================If you appreciated this episode, and would like to receive a weekly note from Eileen about the Brain First Parenting journey every Monday, you can subscribe to her free newsletter HERE!You can also check out all the FREE resources Eileen offers for parents, and learn more about all things Brain First at her website: eileendevine.comAnd of course, find and follow Eileen on social media:FacebookInstagramPinterest

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• Ep. 12 | Addressing Problematic Behaviors

  SUMMARY - When you have a child who often behaves in ways that are not good, right, or appropriate, you want to address the problematic behavior as their parent. This can be challenging to do with a child who lives with a neurobehavioral difference and must be approached in a way that has their brain in mind. In this episode, Eileen talks about why this process can be more challenging for kids with neurobehavioral differences, and how parents can take a different approach to address problematic behaviors.TAKEAWAYS:It is within the role and responsibility of a parent to address problematic behavior with their child, even when these behaviors are symptoms of a brain-based difference.How addressing problematic behaviors looks different when your child or teen has a neurobehavioral difference.Traditional parenting lens approach to addressing challenging behaviors vs a Brain First approachHow to address problematic behaviors from a Brain First lensWhat cognitive skills are involved in having a conversation about a specific event or situation that included the problematic behaviorWhat it looks like to shift the focus from punishments to building lagging skills and why this is a better use of your energyRELATED BLOG POSTS:Moving Forward by Circling Back=======================If you appreciated this episode, and would like to receive a weekly note from Eileen about the Brain First Parenting journey every Monday, you can subscribe to her free newsletter HERE!You can also check out all the FREE resources Eileen offers for parents, and learn more about all things Brain First at her website: eileendevine.comAnd of course, find and follow Eileen on social media:FacebookInstagramPinterest

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• Ep. 11 | "You Ruin Everything!"

  SUMMARY - In this episode, Eileen speaks to the experience of parenting a child who is often times seen as the kid who "ruins everything". She breaks down what is actually happening when a child's behavior appears to be intentional and willful, how to shift to seeing them through a Brain First Parenting lens, and steps parents can take to proactively prevent the same outcome in the future.TAKEAWAYS:Having a child who is seen as "ruining everything" is unfortunately a common experience for parents of kids with brain-based differences and challenging behavioral symptoms.In these hard moments, the task for parents is to shift from a behavioral lens to a Brain First lens. Eileen provides some ideas on how to do this.What parents can focus and reflect on after the difficult experience has passed, to deepen their understanding of their child and proactively build in more accommodations for future events to prevent the same negative outcome.What a child begins to believe about themselves when they are seen as "ruining everything" and how parents can buffer against these negative outcomes.Related Blog Posts:"You Ruin Everything."Looking for individualized parent support? Eileen offers parent coaching to parents across the globe. You can learn more about her one-to-one support services HERE. =======================If you appreciated this episode, and would like to receive a weekly note from Eileen about the Brain First Parenting journey every Monday, you can subscribe to her free newsletter HERE!You can also check out all the FREE resources Eileen offers for parents, and learn more about all things Brain First at her website: eileendevine.comAnd of course, find and follow Eileen on social media:FacebookInstagramPinterest

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• Ep. 10 | The Unspoken Part: Acknowledging the Parent Experience

  SUMMARY - When you are the parent of a child or teen with brain-based differences and challenging behavioral symptoms, it is a common experience to not have your experience, as the parent, acknowledged or supported. This is the other side of the "coin" when parenting from a Brain First lens, and deserves (and requires) as much attention and support as the other side of the "coin", which is the child and their needs. In this episode, Eileen reflects on her own experience, as well as those of parents she has worked with, highlighting the importance of attending to your well-being as a parent of a complex child with intense needs.TAKEAWAYS:Understanding both sides of the Brain First Parenting "coin" is essential to being able to thrive in the experience of parenting a child with brain-based differences and challenging behavioral symptoms.The first side is understanding your child's unique neurobiology and parenting them in alignment with how their brain and nervous system works. The other side, which is largely ignored or unacknowledged, is the lived experience of the parent.Why it is essential to acknowledge the unique (and often hard) aspects of parenting a child or teen with intense needs, and why this is where healing can take place.If you feel like you would benefit from one-to-one, individualized support, you can checkout the parent coaching support Eileen offers parents just like you.RELATED BLOG POSTS:Tending Both Sides of the Parenting CoinReconsidering What It Means to Be Resilient=======================If you appreciated this episode, and would like to receive a weekly note from Eileen about the Brain First Parenting journey every Monday, you can subscribe to her free newsletter HERE!You can also check out all the FREE resources Eileen offers for parents, and learn more about all things Brain First at her website: eileendevine.comAnd of course, find and follow Eileen on social media:FacebookInstagramPinterest

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