Space for Life

Keith McCurdy is back on Space for Life for a follow-up to his episode on raising sturdy kids. This time the focus shifts to the adults, because it takes a sturdy adult to raise a sturdy child. After 40 years in mental health and tens of thousands of families, Keith shares why healthy struggle is the engine of growth, how to stop letting your emotions run the show, and the practices that build the kind of strength to do hard things and stay rooted in what actually matters.

What You'll Take Away:
Why healthy struggle is the engine of growth and maturity for adults, not just kids.
How to stop letting emotions run you with the "no parenting above a five" rule.
A simple framework for processing your past: honor what's honorable, respect what's respectable, and forgive the rest.
Why most things that feel like emergencies are not, and the question to ask yourself in the moment.
The four Ps that keep adults chasing the wrong identity, and what to chase instead.
How forbearance and forgiveness function as the glue of every healthy relationship.
Why cultivating relationships takes the same intentional effort we give our hobbies and our work.
The one small step Keith recommends to start with today.

Timestamps:
(0:00) Intro
(3:19) Why sturdiness matters now
(10:35) Short term happiness vs long term wellness
(19:48) We are not victims of our history
(25:49) Are your emotions running you
(27:14) The emotion Richter scale
(38:38) The four Ps of false identity
(43:54) Why we should not avoid struggle
(54:35) The practice of forbearance
(1:03:15) Start small with one thing

Resources:
Keith's upcoming book, Raising Sturdy Kids, releasing May or June 2026.
Basecamp Live podcast with Davies Owens, where Keith has appeared on roughly 50 episodes covering related topics.

In this episode, Tommy sits down with Shola Richards, known as The Kindness Extremist and Brother Teresa, to talk about what kindness actually looks like when life gets hard. Shola shares his story of moving from bullying, burnout, and a near tragic moment on an LA freeway to building a global mission around freakishly practical kindness. The conversation gets into the real difference between niceness and kindness, how to handle the toxic people in your life, and why the hardest person to be kind to is usually yourself.

What You'll Hear in This Episode:
Why kindness takes more courage than most people realize
Shola's story of being highly sensitive, bullied, and burned out, and the moment that redirected his life
The clear difference between being nice and being kind
Six warning signs of a truly toxic person versus someone just having a bad day
The Just Like Me practice for staying open when you would normally judge
Why forgiveness is an act of kindness toward yourself, not the person who hurt you
A simple courtroom framework for cross-examining your own negative self-talk
Box breathing, knowing your triggers, and other tools for staying responsive instead of reactive

Timestamps:
(0:00) Intro
(4:01) Shola's Story
(8:28) Making kindness freakishly practical
(14:05) Why kindness takes real courage
(16:30) Niceness vs kindness
(19:00) Six warning signs of a toxic person
(26:23) Are we part of the flood
(29:18) The 'Just Like Me' practice
(33:24) What forgiveness really means
(42:25) Boundaries as a backdoor kindness
(45:47) Turning kindness toward yourself
(49:29) The courtroom of the mind
(55:47) Where to find Shola

Resources / Next Steps:
Shola's website, thesholarichards.com
The Kindness Extremist Podcast
Shola on Substack and LinkedIn
Civil Unity by Shola Richards
Go Together Global

Tommy reunites with close friend and collaborator Patricia Clarke for a rich, wide-ranging conversation on one of life's most important and most misunderstood questions: what does it actually mean to find and live a life of purpose? They bring two completely different approaches to the table, one intuitive and spontaneous, one intentional and structured, and together they land on something that applies to everyone regardless of age, season, or personality type. This is one of those conversations that will make you think differently about your own life.

What You'll Hear in This Episode:
Why the question of purpose never goes away and keeps changing at every age and stage of life
Patricia's Michelangelo framework: purpose is not something you implant, it is already inside you waiting to be revealed
Tommy's four P framework for finding your purpose: passion, power, personality, and purpose
Why the things that come most naturally to us are often the things we discount the most
How accepting your deficiencies, not just your strengths, is one of the most freeing parts of living on purpose
Patricia's waterfall story from Joshua Tree and why anything done in love has an eternal quality to it
Why your grandmother's mashed potato recipe matters more than you think

Timestamps:
(0:00) Intro and reunion
(3:03) Purpose is a question that never goes away
(5:47) Michelangelo and the purpose already inside you
(11:08) Patricia's approach: spontaneous, intuitive, looking back
(20:12) Tommy's four P framework: passion, power, personality, purpose
(33:21) Accepting your deficiencies and living in your lane
(44:08) The Joshua Tree waterfall and love's eternal quality
(54:56) Closing encouragement for people who feel stuck

Resources / Next Steps: Share this episode with someone who is navigating a season of uncertainty about their purpose or calling.

Tommy sits down with Katherine Wolf, stroke survivor, author, and co-founder of Hope Heals, for one of his dream conversations. At 26, Katherine had a massive brain stem stroke that left her permanently disabled, and nearly two decades later she is one of the most compelling voices on suffering, hope, and what it means to live a truly good life in the middle of an impossibly hard one. This is a conversation about what it looks like when good and hard coexist, and why the pain you are carrying right now might be too precious to waste.

What You'll Hear in This Episode:
Katherine's story: the brain stem stroke at 26 that changed everything and the nearly two years of recovery that followed
Why there is no quota on suffering this side of heaven, and how that reframing actually brings freedom
The invisible wheelchairs we all carry, and why the disabilities nobody can see often do the most damage
The difference between wanting a cure and actually needing healing, drawn from the blind man in John 9
What the practice of hope looks like when the feeling of hope is completely gone
The Isaiah 45 passage that became the foundation for Treasures in the Dark and why she chose to gather treasure instead of waste it
How to radically accept your story and trust an unknown future to a known God

Timestamps:
(0:00) Intro and Katherine's story
(7:35) No quota on suffering
(11:51) Invisible wheelchairs
(14:43) Redefining what good actually means
(21:34) Treasures in the Dark and Isaiah 45
(28:18) The difference between a cure and healing
(30:18) Practicing hope when you can't feel it
(36:04) Hope Heals Camp and radical belonging
(45:51) Trusting an unknown future to a known God

Resources / Next Steps: Learn more about Katherine and Hope Heals at hopeheals.com. Listen to The Good Hard Story podcast on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. Pick up Treasures in the Dark on Amazon. If you are in Atlanta, visit Mend Coffee!

Tommy sits down with Drew Daniels, founding pastor of Boulevard Church in Richmond, Virginia, to explore what the resurrection of Jesus Christ actually means, not just theologically, but historically and personally. They walk through the evidence, wrestle with the hard questions, and land on why a 2000-year-old event still changes everything about how we live today. Drew brings an honest, grounded faith to one of Tommy's favorite conversation topics of the year.

What You'll Hear in This Episode:
Drew's family inheritance of faith, from a self-taught preacher grandfather in rural Nebraska to his own call to plant a church
Why Christianity is the only world religion built on the claim that God came to you, not the other way around
The historical and extra-biblical evidence that gives the resurrection credibility 2000 years later
Why Tommy believes the resurrection can't be proven but says the preponderance of evidence is overwhelming
The C.S. Lewis framework: Jesus is either a liar, a lunatic, or Lord
What Tim Keller meant when he said the gospel changes everything
Drew's raw story of asking God for a week off from belief during the hardest season of church planting, and what happened the next morning

Timestamps:
(0:00) Intro
(3:37) Drew's story
(10:31) Why the resurrection matters
(22:57) Historical evidence for the resurrection
(26:11) The disciples' martyrdom and women at the tomb
(34:03) What difference does it make?
(50:22) Final Thoughts + Connect with Boulevard Church

Resources / Next Steps: Learn more about Drew and Boulevard Church at blvdchurchrva.com. They meet Sundays at 1212 N Arthur Ashe Blvd in Richmond's Scott's Addition neighborhood. Whether you're a person of faith or still figuring out what you believe, they'd love to have you.

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