The Rizzuto Show | Daily Comedy Podcast

Shark-infested surfing, an escaped inmate, Greek Fire's epic comeback, and a $250 coffin buffet. Just another perfectly normal day on The Rizzuto Show.
Rizz, Moon Valjean, Lern, Rafe Williams, and King Scott are back with another chaotic funny podcast packed with bizarre St. Louis news, celebrity gossip, hilarious fails, and the kind of conversations that make you question how these people are allowed near microphones.
Rafe kicks things off by revealing that he once went surfing in San Diego during great white shark season. The best part? His friend waited until Rafe was already in the water to mention the sharks. Nothing like learning to surf while dressed as a delicious, confused sea lion.
Back in St. Louis, the crew discusses a wild escape from the City Justice Center, where an inmate reportedly crawled through the ceiling and walked out past malfunctioning security systems. Things get even stranger when a listener calls in with his own decades-old jail escape story. The gang also covers serious local crime headlines, debates the future of ziplining at Creve Coeur Park, and puts Missouri stereotypes under the microscope in the Great St. Louis Debate.
On a much happier note, Moon celebrates Greek Fire's triumphant return to Delmar Hall after seven years without a full headlining show. With theatrical production, new music, and an emotional moment watching his son sing along in the crowd, it's a reminder of just how incredible St. Louis music can be.
Meanwhile, Lern discovers Cat Collector, an app that's basically Pokémon Go for neighborhood cats. Because apparently taking pictures of random cats wasn't enough. Now she can collect them, track them, and potentially turn her entire neighborhood into a feline treasure hunt.
The crew also discusses Grand Theft Auto 6 and its potential billion-dollar impact on workplace productivity, while Crap on Celebrities delivers entertainment gossip involving Taylor Swift, Mötley Crüe, Ted Lasso, and more. Naturally, the conversation eventually turns into an argument about the greatest cartoon villains of the 1980s.
Then comes the Great American Geography Disaster, where Rizz and Moon ace a blank map of the United States while Lern struggles to locate Delaware and Rafe temporarily forgets Alabama exists. Somewhere, a fifth-grade geography teacher just started crying.
And finally, Facebook Marketplace Price Is Right returns with some truly disturbing local listings: a crocheted Halloween surprise, creepy dental models, a Gremlin skeleton, a questionable teddy bear magnet, and a full-size coffin converted into a buffet table for $250. Because nothing says “enjoy the nachos” quite like eating them out of a casket.
The grand finale? A 1983 Chrysler LeBaron that used to talk, listed for $3,800 despite a collection of mechanical problems. Moon wins the pricing challenge, proving that vintage automotive knowledge is apparently more useful than knowing where Wyoming is.
From shark encounters and St. Louis crime stories to rock-and-roll celebrations, weird technology, horror movie villains, celebrity chaos, and Facebook Marketplace nightmares, this funny podcast delivers everything you love about The Rizzuto Show: sarcastic humor, funny stories, pop culture commentary, and absolutely unnecessary arguments.
Join Rizz and the gang for another installment of this funny podcast, where the geography is questionable, the shopping decisions are worse, and the only thing scarier than a great white shark is somebody serving dinner out of a coffin.
Follow The Rizzuto Show → linktr.ee/rizzshow for more from your favorite daily comedy show.
Connect with The Rizzuto Show Comedy Podcast online → 1057thepoint.com/RizzShow.
Hear The Rizz Show daily on the radio at 105.7 The Point | Hubbard Radio in St. Louis, MO.
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Lern can't find Delaware, Rafe forgot Alabama existed, somebody in Missouri is selling a coffin buffet, and a 1983 Chrysler LeBaron might be the most emotionally available vehicle ever manufactured. Welcome to The Rizzuto Show, where the education system has officially requested a refund.
It's another spectacularly questionable morning on The Rizzuto Show, the funny podcast where St. Louis comedy, weird Facebook Marketplace listings, terrible geography skills, and vintage automotive technology come together to prove that adulthood is mostly just pretending you remember things from fifth grade.
Rizz, Moon Valjean, Lern, Rafe Williams, and King Scott are back with a daily dose of sarcastic humor, ridiculous discoveries, and the kind of friendly workplace humiliation that probably wouldn't survive a corporate team-building seminar.
And today, it all begins with a blank map of the United States.
Sounds harmless, right?
Wrong.
THE GREAT AMERICAN GEOGRAPHY DISASTER
Somebody decided the crew should try filling in all 50 states on a blank map, and within minutes, the studio became a living argument against standardized testing.
Rizz and Moon apparently knocked out the entire country in under three minutes with perfect scores. Naturally, they celebrated by wandering around correcting everybody else's work like two insufferable fifth-grade honor students.
Meanwhile, Lern was experiencing a geographical crisis.
Delaware? Possibly somewhere near Montana.
Wyoming? Missing in action.
Nebraska? Apparently farther north than expected.
And New England? Just a confusing collection of tiny states that nobody wants to deal with before breakfast.
Rafe wasn't doing much better. He knew Mississippi, Alabama, and Georgia were somewhere near each other, but determining the actual order was becoming a full-blown investigation.
At one point, he admitted he'd temporarily forgotten Alabama existed.
That's not a geography mistake. That's an entire state being deleted from your mental hard drive.
The crew debates the locations of Connecticut, Rhode Island, Vermont, New Hampshire, and Delaware while Moon attempts to explain the map without completely losing his patience.
Spoiler alert: Nobody leaves this exercise feeling particularly intelligent.
If you've ever looked at a blank map and suddenly questioned everything you learned in elementary school, congratulations. You're qualified to join the show.
FACEBOOK MARKETPLACE: THE PRICE IS WRONG, PROBABLY
Once the geography disaster finally ends, the gang moves on to something much more educational: guessing the prices of absolute nonsense being sold by strangers on Facebook Marketplace.
Rafe Williams takes over as the show's deeply suspicious auctioneer for another round of Facebook Marketplace Price Is Right, where listeners team up with Rizz Show members and try to win concert tickets by correctly estimating the asking prices of local listings.
The rules are simple: Get as close as possible without going over.
The merchandise? Anything but simple.
First up is a handmade Halloween decoration from Curryville, Missouri, described as a surprise pumpkin ghost.
Sounds adorable.
Until you lift the little ghost covering and discover a crocheted anatomical surprise.
That's right. Somebody made a festive pumpkin-themed private part, listed it online, and apparently found enough customers to start taking back orders.
The asking price? $25.
King Scott wins the round, because apparently knowing the market value of handmade Halloween anatomy is one of his hidden talents.
Next comes a terrifying dental training model from the Dittmer area, complete with a silicone mouth full of disturbingly crooked teeth.
It's the sort of object you'd expect to find in a dentist's office, a horror movie, or the basement of somebody who insists they're completely normal.
Moon suspects it could be expensive.
He's right.
The asking price is $150, and Moon takes the victory.
Who knew creepy practice teeth were such a valuable commodity?
Then the gang encounters a 3D-printed Gremlin skeleton being sold in Wentzville, Missouri.
The listing claims it's three feet tall, although the crew spends an impressive amount of time arguing over whether the photograph actually supports that measurement.
Is it three feet? Thirty inches? Three inches? Is the couch enormous?
Nobody knows, but everybody has an opinion.
The gang debates the value of 3D printing, the questionable business decisions of Marketplace sellers, and whether anyone actually wants a Gremlin skeleton in their living room.
The price turns out to be just $30, making it a surprisingly affordable way to terrify houseguests.
King Scott wins again.
Then there's a vintage 1999 Bad Taste Bears magnet named Willie.
It's a teddy bear wearing a trench coat.
Unfortunately, the trench coat is open.
Very open.
Somebody apparently kept this charming little collectible in a bar for years before deciding the world deserved another chance to own it.
The asking price? $25.
That's a lot of money for a refrigerator magnet that should probably come with a warning from Human Resources.
THE CASKET BUFFET NOBODY REQUESTED
Just when you think Facebook Marketplace can't possibly get more bizarre, Rafe unveils the crown jewel of questionable party planning.
A full-size casket from Moscow Mills, Missouri.
But this isn't just any casket.
Somebody has repurposed it into a buffet table, complete with serving trays.
Because apparently the missing ingredient at your next Halloween party is the sensation of eating potato salad out of a coffin.
The gang immediately revisits an old discussion about funeral nachos and starts imagining the catering possibilities.
A coffin full of nachos?
A final resting place for mostaccioli?
A six-foot-long buffet of questionable life choices?
The seller originally wanted $400 but dropped the asking price to $250 for a Halloween special.
King Scott nails the closest bid without going over, continuing his deeply concerning dominance in the marketplace of things nobody should reasonably own.
Seriously, how does this man know what a used coffin buffet costs?
And should we be asking follow-up questions?
THE TALKING CHRYSLER LEBARON SHOWDOWN
For the grand finale, Rafe brings out something genuinely fascinating.
A 1983 Chrysler LeBaron Mark Cross Edition convertible listed around Columbia and Dupo, Illinois.
It's got wood-grain styling, leather seats, new tires, a cracked windshield, leaking power steering, questionable shocks, and a feature that absolutely steals the show.
The car talks.
Or at least, it used to.
The LeBaron originally featured an electronic voice-alert system that could interrupt the radio to tell drivers about low fuel, oil pressure, seat belts, and other vehicle warnings.
Imagine driving down the highway while your car speaks to you in the stern, disappointed voice of a father who just saw your report card.
The gang digs into the technology, listens to examples of vintage talking-car alerts, and immediately starts imagining what else the LeBaron might say if somebody reprogrammed it.
Naturally, the conversation becomes wildly inappropriate for an automotive history lesson.
The original talking feature on this particular car no longer works, but the crew still debates whether its collectible appeal makes up for the mechanical problems.
Moon guesses $3,300.
King Scott goes with $2,500.
The other bids fall considerably lower.
The actual asking price?
$3,800.
Moon wins, proving that sometimes the secret to Facebook Marketplace success is understanding that an old car with a broken windshield and a dead voice system can still be priced like a beloved family heirloom.
Would anybody actually pay that much?
That's another question entirely.
ST. LOUIS COMEDY, TERRIBLE MAPS & BEAUTIFULLY BAD SHOPPING DECISIONS
This episode is packed with the kind of weird news, funny stories, local discoveries, and sarcastic commentary that make The Rizzuto Show a uniquely chaotic morning radio experience.
From Lern's battle with Delaware to Rafe's Halloween-themed Marketplace finds, from King Scott's uncanny pricing instincts to Moon's surprising knowledge of vintage convertibles, every segment proves that you never know what you're going to learn on this show.
Sometimes it's the location of Rhode Island.
Sometimes it's the going rate for a crocheted pumpkin surprise.
And sometimes it's the horrifying realization that somebody out there has turned a coffin into a catering business opportunity.
Whether you're listening from St. Louis, Southern Illinois, or anywhere else that appreciates a little daily comedy with absolutely no educational standards, this funny podcast delivers the laughs, the arguments, and the wonderfully unnecessary details you didn't know your morning needed.
So grab your coffee, refresh your knowledge of the 50 states, and maybe reconsider whatever you're about to purchase on Facebook Marketplace.
Because somewhere out there, somebody is selling a talking Chrysler LeBaron for $3,800.
And somebody else is serving dinner out of a coffin.
Join Rizz and the gang for another episode of the funny podcast where the prices are ridiculous, the geography is worse, and the only thing more confused than the crew is the audience trying to figure out why they're still listening.
See you tomorrow.
Assuming we can find Missouri on the map.
Follow The Rizzuto Show → linktr.ee/rizzshow for more from your favorite daily comedy show.
Connect with The Rizzuto Show Comedy Podcast online → 1057thepoint.com/RizzShow.
Hear The Rizz Show daily on the radio at 105.7 The Point | Hubbard Radio in St. Louis, MO.

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Greek Fire is back after seven years, Lern has discovered Pokémon Go for actual cats, and Grand Theft Auto 6 might cost the economy a billion dollars. Just another perfectly normal morning with The Rizzuto Show.
Welcome to another episode of The Rizzuto Show, the funny podcast where St. Louis rock legends, celebrity gossip, ridiculous apps, and questionable financial decisions all share the same microphone. Rizz, Moon Valjean, Lern, Rafe Williams, and King Scott are back with a daily dose of comedy, weird news, entertainment updates, and enough sarcasm to make your morning commute slightly less miserable.
And today, we're celebrating something genuinely awesome: the return of Greek Fire!
After seven years without a full headlining show, Moon Valjean and Greek Fire returned to the stage at Delmar Hall for an incredible night of music, theatrical production, and some seriously emotional moments.
Moon breaks down the band's massive 90-minute performance, complete with multimedia visuals, multiple acts, costume changes, and brand-new music from their upcoming record. The crew shares their favorite moments, including the return of fan-favorite songs, an enthusiastic St. Louis crowd, and the impressive behind-the-scenes production team that helped bring everything together.
But the moment that really got Moon? Seeing his son in the audience, singing along and enjoying the music as an actual fan.
Yeah, we got emotional. Don't make it weird.
The show also helped support Cardinal Glennon Children's Hospital, and Moon shares what's next for Greek Fire, including plans for new music and merchandise.
Of course, we can't stay sentimental forever. This is The Rizzuto Show, and somebody is always one conversation away from ruining a beautiful moment.
Enter Lern's latest obsession: Cat Collector.
Imagine Pokémon Go, except instead of hunting imaginary creatures, you're photographing actual neighborhood cats and building a digital collection of every feline you encounter.
There's a cat map. There are cat sightings. There are plans for cats with special powers.
And naturally, Lern is immediately interested.
The gang debates whether this is the greatest app ever invented for crazy cat ladies or a suspiciously efficient way to locate everybody's pets. There's also the small matter of a $35 annual subscription.
Will Lern pay for the privilege of collecting cats she doesn't own? Will Moon finally find his elusive Maine Coon? And how long before somebody turns a harmless cat app into a full-blown neighborhood surveillance operation?
Meanwhile, Grand Theft Auto 6 is apparently preparing to become more than a video game. It's becoming an economic event.
The crew discusses a prediction that roughly 1.5 million Americans could skip work when the game launches, potentially costing businesses a billion dollars in lost productivity. They also marvel at the game's enormous reported development budget and the rumors that Rockstar Games offered Daft Punk an open checkbook to reunite for the soundtrack.
Daft Punk reportedly said no.
Imagine having so much money that somebody offers you practically unlimited cash and your response is basically, "Nah, we're good."
Must be nice.
Then it's time for Crap on Celebrities, where the entertainment world once again proves that fame doesn't automatically come with common sense.
Lern brings the latest on Mötley Crüe's Las Vegas residency, Vince Neil's health history, and whether Moon should just take over lead vocals. Taylor Swift is back in the headlines after a reported awkward encounter with a fan filming her at a Kansas City Chiefs game, prompting a debate about celebrity privacy, superstar status, and whether fame eventually becomes bigger than the music itself.
The crew also discusses Dominic Fike's older song finding new life on TikTok, possible future episodes of Ted Lasso, and rumors involving Jennifer Lopez and Brett Goldstein.
Yes, Roy Kent and J.Lo.
Lern is concerned. Moon is concerned. Everybody seems concerned.
Somebody should probably check on Roy.
Things get even stranger with a tour of supposedly haunted country music landmarks, including Nashville's Ryman Auditorium, Graceland, and places rumored to have some very famous ghosts hanging around.
Because apparently even Elvis can't get a little peace and quiet.
The gang also discusses serious allegations in Halle Berry's ongoing custody dispute, Eric Dane's memoir and reflections on his struggles with addiction and ALS, and remembers the late Office Space actor Richard Riehle by revisiting the legendary Jump to Conclusions Mat.
And just when you think the entertainment news is finished, the entire studio gets into an argument over the greatest cartoon villains of the 1980s.
Megatron. Skeletor. Cobra Commander. Shredder. Hordak.
Who deserves the top spot? Who got robbed? And how did a conversation about cartoon villains become something these grown adults are genuinely passionate about?
Because nostalgia is a powerful drug, apparently.
Throw in the crew's opening debate about pretzels versus mangoes as acceptable radio snacks, some truly questionable celebrity birthday trivia, and a preview of their Facebook Marketplace version of The Price Is Right, and you've got another wonderfully unhinged morning in St. Louis.
Whether you're here for Moon's Greek Fire comeback, Lern's descent into cat-collecting madness, the latest pop culture commentary, or the ongoing spectacle of five adults arguing about things that absolutely do not matter, this funny podcast has something for you.
So grab your coffee, put down the pretzels before somebody hears you chewing, and join Rizz and the gang for another round of daily humor, funny stories, rock music, and entertainment chaos.
It's another episode of the funny podcast that proves St. Louis mornings are anything but boring.
And seriously, if you see Lern wandering through your neighborhood taking pictures of cats, don't panic.
She's just leveling up.
Follow The Rizzuto Show → linktr.ee/rizzshow for more from your favorite daily comedy show.
Connect with The Rizzuto Show Comedy Podcast online → 1057thepoint.com/RizzShow.
Hear The Rizz Show daily on the radio at 105.7 The Point | Hubbard Radio in St. Louis, MO.
See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Rafe Williams went surfing during great white shark season, a St. Louis jail escape turned into a real-life action movie, and Lern has officially declared war on ziplining. Somehow, those aren't even the weirdest things happening in Missouri.
Welcome back to The Rizzuto Show, the funny podcast where local news, bizarre stories, horror movies, and questionable vacation decisions collide in one gloriously chaotic morning. Rizz, Moon Valjean, Lern, Rafe Williams, and King Scott are tackling everything from shark-infested waters to St. Louis stereotypes, proving once again that this city has plenty of personality. Some of it probably needs professional supervision.
Moon is back from San Diego, Dallas, and Phoenix, and the crew immediately starts debating whether San Diego might be the closest thing America has to paradise. Perfect weather, beautiful beaches, and the possibility of never wanting to return to Missouri? Sounds suspiciously appealing.
But Rafe has a warning for anybody planning to learn how to surf there.
He once spent Christmas vacation flailing around on a surfboard in San Diego, only to discover halfway through that it was great white shark season. His friend conveniently forgot to mention that detail until Rafe was already in the ocean, dressed in a wetsuit and looking like a confused sea lion.
Did he stand up on the board? Absolutely not.
Did he see a shark? Thankfully, no.
Did he spend most of the experience trying not to drown? You bet.
And now Lern is considering surfing during her own upcoming San Diego Christmas trip. What could possibly go wrong?
Back home, the gang dives into a serious St. Louis news story involving an escape from the City Justice Center. According to the report discussed on the show, a detainee allegedly climbed into a ceiling crawl space, traveled through the building's ventilation infrastructure, and exited through a door whose alarm failed to activate.
The escape triggered a manhunt, and the suspect was eventually apprehended roughly 12 miles away in Affton. The crew discusses the multiple reported security failures, the questions surrounding how he traveled so far, and the public-safety officials who acknowledged the breakdown.
Then the story takes an unexpected turn when a listener calls in with his own jail escape experience from decades earlier.
Matthew says he once climbed through ductwork after getting arrested following a fight at a county fair. His escape attempt included crawling through the ceiling, retrieving his shoes, running through a police station, and accidentally choosing a restroom door instead of the exit.
Spoiler alert: He didn't make it out.
But he did eventually marry the girlfriend involved in the original incident, which might be the most chaotic love story we've heard all week.
The show also addresses the heartbreaking fatal shooting of 17-year-old Alyssa Wilson on Interstate 170 and the subsequent arrests reported by investigators. It's a sobering conversation about public safety, a young life lost, and the devastating impact on a St. Louis family and community.
And just when everybody needs a less disturbing local headline, Gus's World Famous Fried Chicken enters the conversation.
Unfortunately, not because somebody invented a delicious new side dish.
The crew discusses allegations that a restaurant employee in Maplewood threatened to burn down the business, cut the power, and poured peanut oil across the floor while coworkers were inside. Employees reportedly escaped safely, and the suspect was arrested.
It's a genuinely frightening situation, but naturally, King Scott still finds a way to contribute a terrible peanut-oil nickname.
Because apparently the microphone comes with absolutely no quality control.
Then the gang asks a terrifying question: Which horror movie villain would you least want to fight in real life?
Rizz makes the case for Pennywise, the nightmare-inducing shapeshifter from IT, while Moon fears Freddy Krueger because nobody wants to fight a supernatural murderer in a dream where your punches move like you're underwater.
The Xenomorph from Alien enters the debate thanks to its acid blood and extremely unpleasant reproductive habits. Lern brings up the possessed mother from Hereditary, while the crew considers Michael Myers, Leatherface, Art the Clown, Pinhead, and Anton Chigurh from No Country for Old Men.
The discussion somehow becomes a detailed comparison of immortal killers, demonic possessions, nightmare physics, and whether you could simply avoid the entire problem by refusing to go into space.
Honestly, that's a pretty solid survival strategy.
Meanwhile, St. Louis may be losing another outdoor attraction.
The crew discusses the uncertain future of the Go Ape ropes and zipline course at Creve Coeur Park, along with the closure of another local adventure facility. Are St. Louis residents not adventurous enough? Are these attractions too expensive? Or does nobody know they exist because their advertising consists of a sign nailed to a tree?
Lern has a different explanation.
She hates ziplining.
Not because she's afraid of heights. Not because she doesn't enjoy adventure. But because multiple ziplining experiences have somehow become associated with severe gastrointestinal emergencies.
Yes, Lern has managed to turn an outdoor adventure discussion into another story about diarrhea.
At this point, it's practically a show tradition.
That leads into the Great St. Louis Debate, where Rizz asks artificial intelligence to describe the stereotypes associated with Missouri, St. Louis, and Southern Illinois.
Are Missourians excessively polite? Are we Midwestern or Southern? Do we really spend our weekends hunting, talking to strangers, and explaining where we went to high school? And why does every conversation about Missouri eventually involve barbecue, the Ozarks, or somebody getting offended by a stereotype?
The crew puts local identity under the microscope, with plenty of sarcastic humor and some surprisingly accurate observations about life in the Midwest.
It's St. Louis comedy, strange local headlines, terrifying movie monsters, vacation disasters, and the kind of daily humor that makes this funny podcast a questionable but highly entertaining part of your morning routine.
So grab your coffee, lock your doors, stay out of the shark-infested water, and maybe skip the zipline if Lern is giving travel advice.
Join The Rizzuto Show for another episode of this funny podcast, where even a simple conversation about San Diego can somehow end with escaped inmates, haunted dreams, and a full-scale debate about what's wrong with St. Louis.
And if somebody invites you surfing during great white season, maybe ask a few follow-up questions before putting on the wetsuit.
Follow The Rizzuto Show → linktr.ee/rizzshow for more from your favorite daily comedy show.
Connect with The Rizzuto Show Comedy Podcast online → 1057thepoint.com/RizzShow.
Hear The Rizz Show daily on the radio at 105.7 The Point | Hubbard Radio in St. Louis, MO.
See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Rizz, King Scott, Moon, Lern, and Rafe Williams are bringing you a massive helping of St. Louis morning radio chaos in this funny podcast packed with celebrity gossip, bizarre news stories, dating disasters, rock-and-roll debates, and enough ridiculous conversations to make you seriously reconsider the people you spend your mornings with.
First, Rafe returns from an unforgettable trip to Ann Arbor, Michigan, where he performed stand-up comedy with St. Louis favorites the Sklar Brothers and somehow ended up receiving the VIP treatment from the University of Michigan football program.
We're talking luxury locker rooms, personal massage chairs, private barbers, bowling alleys, golf simulators, enormous indoor practice facilities, and enough free food to make a grown man consider enrolling in college again.
Rafe tours the Wolverines' incredible athletic facilities, receives Michigan Jordans and a jacket, and gets to experience the excitement of game day at the legendary Big House. He even helps hold the Michigan banner before the team runs onto the field.
Naturally, he spends much of the weekend wondering whether Bob Seger might suddenly appear.
Because apparently the University of Michigan's greatest attraction isn't football. It's the possibility of running into the guy who sang “Night Moves.”
And if you're wondering why Rafe is wearing a glorious blonde mullet wig back in the studio, thank the NFL Pick'em Challenge.
The wig is punishment for his football predictions, but the truly disturbing part is how good it looks on him. Lern thinks he can pull off any hairstyle, Rizz agrees it looks surprisingly natural, and Rafe has an important meeting with a potential client later that day.
Nothing screams business professional quite like a man who looks ready to sell you a used Trans Am.
Speaking of questionable appearances, BIGFOOT APPARENTLY HAD REHEARSAL FOOTAGE.
The gang discusses the documentary Capturing Bigfoot, which reportedly features a test clip resembling the legendary 1967 Patterson-Gimlin Bigfoot footage.
Yes, the most famous Sasquatch sighting in history might have had a practice run.
Rizz is devastated by the possibility that the iconic footage was staged, but Rafe has a much more compelling theory.
Bigfoot is real according to our resident Cryptozoologist King Scott.
He's just not living in the woods anymore.
According to Rafe, some woman probably found him hiking, shaved him down, cleaned him up, and got him a respectable job selling Acuras in Chesterfield.
That's right. The reason nobody can find Bigfoot is that he's probably working in suburban St. Louis with a decent benefits package.
Jason Momoa might also be a professionally groomed Yeti.
We're not saying that's true. We're saying Rafe has clearly spent too much time thinking about it.
From cryptozoology, the conversation moves to something almost as difficult to understand: Nathan Fielder's Elizabeth Holmes documentary.
Rafe catches the movie in a packed theater and gives it an enthusiastic A, despite sitting in the front row for nearly three hours.
The documentary follows the disgraced Theranos founder in the period leading up to her prison sentence, with Fielder's signature uncomfortable humor, bizarre interviews, and increasingly complicated questions about what's real and what's staged.
Rafe describes a particularly strange sequence involving Amanda Seyfried's portrayal of Holmes in The Dropout, where the film starts folding back in on itself like a psychological experiment designed specifically to make everybody uncomfortable.
The crew debates the movie's reviews, its unusual R rating, and whether anybody needs a three-hour documentary that requires a bathroom strategy.
Rafe says it's worth it.
His bladder would like to issue a separate review.
Meanwhile, it's National New Friends Day, and the gang has reached a unanimous conclusion:
Making friends as an adult is exhausting.
When you're a kid, you just ask somebody if they like dinosaurs, and suddenly you're best friends.
When you're an adult, you have to coordinate schedules, navigate social expectations, make awkward small talk, and somehow convince another human being that spending time with you is worth leaving their house.
Rizz shares a survey suggesting the average American hasn't made a new friend in five years.
Rafe announces that his friendship department has no vacancies.
Lern explains that her closest friendships work because nobody expects constant communication.
And the crew debates whether adult friendships have become more complicated than dating.
Lern even shares how nervous she was when she asked a woman named Nikki to hang out after their professional relationship ended.
She worried about her appearance, whether they'd click, and whether the invitation would seem weird.
Basically, she went through all the emotional preparation of a first date just to get coffee with another woman.
Thankfully, the friendship worked out.
Which is nice, because nobody needs another rejection story involving a coffee shop.
The gang also tackles the lost art of having friends over for dinner.
Why does nobody host dinner parties anymore?
Is everybody too busy? Too tired? Too broke?
Or is the real problem that once people get comfortable on your couch, they refuse to leave?
Rafe believes spending time in someone's home creates deeper friendships.
Lern believes people should understand when the evening is over.
Her solution?
Gift bags.
Yes, Lern sends guests home with leftover promotional merchandise, batteries, popcorn, and whatever else she's accumulated throughout the year.
It's a brilliant system.
You get a free present, and she gets her house back.
Everybody wins.
Then things get even more awkward when the gang discusses a woman who went viral after being stood up on a Bumble date.
The guy reportedly said he was on his way, never arrived, and left her stuck with more than $100 in expenses for transportation, drinks, shrimp cocktail, and tips.
She wants Bumble to reimburse her.
The crew wonders whether dating apps should be responsible for their users' bad behavior and whether singles should be allowed to leave reviews of people they've dated.
Imagine checking someone's romantic rating before agreeing to dinner.
“Great conversation. Terrible parking. Refused to split dessert. Two stars.”
Of course, the whole system would collapse the moment somebody got rejected and decided revenge was best served through a one-star review.
So maybe the answer isn't rating people like restaurants.
Maybe it's actually going to breakfast.
The gang discusses the growing appeal of breakfast first dates, where you can meet someone for coffee, pancakes, or a quick meal without committing to an expensive evening.
Rizz loves the idea.
Lern appreciates the lower pressure but isn't thrilled about waking up early.
And everybody agrees that if the date goes badly, it's much easier to escape after coffee than after a three-course dinner.
Which brings us to one of the most important questions of the day:
Are pancakes romantic?
The crew explores why younger men may be attracted to older women, discussing confidence, independence, direct communication, and the appeal of relationships without endless dating-app games.
Rafe suggests that an older woman might simply invite you over and offer to make pancakes.
No mixed signals.
No complicated emotional chess.
Just breakfast.
Except a listener quickly points out that an invitation for pancakes can absolutely have another meaning.
And just like that, the most innocent breakfast food in America becomes a relationship controversy.
The crew also debates age-gap relationships involving celebrities like Madonna, Cher, Kris Jenner, and Bill Belichick, asking why society often reacts differently to older men dating younger women than to older women dating younger men.
Along the way, they explore the idea of soulmates.
Does everyone have one true love?
Can you have multiple soulmates?
Can your soulmate be a best friend instead of a romantic partner?
Rafe offers a surprisingly thoughtful theory that people discover different pieces of themselves through the connections they make throughout their lives.
Lern agrees, but immediately wants to know why Rafe gets to sound philosophical without being accused of eating an edible.
It's one of the rare moments when the Rizz Show almost becomes emotionally intelligent.
Fortunately, somebody makes it weird again.
Back in St. Louis, the crew celebrates Greek Fire's return to Delmar Hall, where Moon and the band deliver a theatrical rock performance featuring new music and an impressive stage production.
Rizz and Lern recap the show, but Rizz's evening also includes a restaurant experience that nearly turns into a full-blown customer-service investigation.
An upscale restaurant adds an unexplained 20% service fee to his bill.
Not a tip.
Not an automatic gratuity.
A separate charge that leaves Rizz wondering exactly where the money goes.
His wife Amelia is less than thrilled, and the gang debates hidden restaurant fees, tipping culture, and why dining out now feels like reviewing the terms and conditions of a mortgage.
Rizz also receives a wonderfully ugly little collectible monster called a Fugler from a listener, which Amelia immediately falls in love with.
So the night includes great live music, a questionable restaurant bill, and a terrifying stuffed creature.
Pretty standard Rizz Show weekend.
The crew also discusses the seasonal warning that Missouri deer are in heat, meaning rutting season is underway and drivers need to be especially alert.
Lern describes deer racing through her yard, Rizz recalls seeing deer during a trip to Springfield, and Rafe contributes some extremely questionable wildlife commentary.
The conversation is a reminder that deer are unpredictable this time of year.
Especially when romance is involved.
And speaking of Springfield, Rizz's family trip turns into a debate about Chinese food, Springfield-style cashew chicken, and whether some of Missouri's best restaurant discoveries are hiding in places people don't immediately think to visit.
The gang also discusses America's most boring highways, including those endless stretches of road where the scenery consists of cornfields, truck stops, and the growing suspicion that you've already passed the same exit three times.
Then it's time for Crap on Celebrities, where Lern delivers another collection of entertainment news, music debates, Hollywood controversies, and stories that make celebrity publicists wish they'd chosen accounting.
Billy Corgan praises Blink-182 drummer Travis Barker as one of the most influential drummers of the last three decades, leading the crew into a debate about Barker's impact, Dave Grohl, Danny Carey, and what makes a drummer truly influential.
The gang also discusses reported developments involving Sean “Diddy” Combs, Lil Jon's childhood eye injury and signature sunglasses, Carrot Top's recovery, and upcoming entertainment projects.
Rizz shares a painful family story involving Amelia suffering a corneal injury during an innocent game with their daughter, proving that even the smallest fingernail can become a surprisingly serious problem.
There are movie and television discussions involving True Detective, The Pitt, Nicolas Cage, Antonio Banderas, Jesse Eisenberg, Quentin Tarantino, and the endlessly entertaining career of Jon Favreau.
The crew also revisits one of rock music's greatest debates:
What is the greatest guitar solo of all time?
Prince's “Purple Rain” gets plenty of love, but Rizz makes a passionate case for David Gilmour's work on Pink Floyd's “Comfortably Numb.”
The gang remembers Prince's unforgettable Rock & Roll Hall of Fame performance of “While My Guitar Gently Weeps” and agrees that his guitar playing deserves every bit of recognition it receives.
For a few glorious minutes, everybody agrees on something.
Mark the calendar.
Then it's back to football, where The Rizz Show's NFL Pick'em Challenge continues to produce terrible predictions and excellent punishments.
Moon faces the possibility of conference-room karaoke, which is particularly funny considering he's a professional singer.
Rafe can't understand why singing in front of coworkers would be such a horrifying punishment for somebody who literally performs music for a living.
The Rizz Show also continues its unfortunate losing streak against Fast Lane, proving once again that predicting football games is apparently much harder than making fun of people who predict football games.
And finally, there's the most impressive athletic performance discussed all day.
JOEY CHESTNUT EATS AN EIGHT-POUND PIZZA IN 12 MINUTES AND 6 SECONDS.
The competitive-eating legend visits St. Louis to take on the Junkyard Dog Challenge at Salvage Yard Bar and Grill, where contestants have 45 minutes to finish an enormous eight-pound deep-dish pizza.
Joey destroys it in barely over 12 minutes.
That's eight pounds of pizza.
In twelve minutes.
Some people spend longer than that deciding whether they want mushrooms.
Rizz marvels at Chestnut's competitive-eating abilities, while the crew tries to understand the sheer physical commitment required to consume that much food and somehow continue functioning as a human being.
Between Rafe's blonde mullet, Michigan football luxury, Bigfoot's alleged rehearsal footage, Nathan Fielder's bizarre documentary, adult friendship anxiety, terrible dating experiences, soulmate debates, celebrity news, Missouri deer, Greek Fire, restaurant service fees, and Joey Chestnut's stomach-defying pizza challenge, this funny podcast delivers exactly the kind of unpredictable entertainment that makes The Rizzuto Show a St. Louis morning-radio staple.
It's funny stories, weird news, pop culture commentary, relationship disasters, music debates, and daily comedy from a crew that somehow manages to turn ordinary conversations into completely unnecessary investigations.
Join Rizz, Lern, Rafe Williams, and the gang for another chaotic installment of this funny podcast, where Bigfoot might be selling cars in Chesterfield, your next first date might involve pancakes, and Joey Chestnut has officially eaten more pizza in 12 minutes than most people should eat in a weekend.
And remember:
If you see Bigfoot in the suburbs, ask about financing.
If you invite friends over, have the gift bags ready.
If somebody offers you pancakes, clarify their intentions.
And if Joey Chestnut challenges you to dinner, just hand him the menu and admit defeat.

Follow The Rizzuto Show → linktr.ee/rizzshow for more from your favorite daily comedy show.
Connect with The Rizzuto Show Comedy Podcast online → 1057thepoint.com/RizzShow.
Hear The Rizz Show daily on the radio at 105.7 The Point | Hubbard Radio in St. Louis, MO.
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