Marriage Therapy Radio

Zach sits down with couples therapist and author Colette Jane Fehr and her husband Steve Fehr for a candid conversation about second marriage, difference, repair, and what therapy really does—and doesn’t—solve. Colette and Steve met later in life after very different first marriages and divorces. She’s an emotionally expressive, extroverted therapist from New York; he’s a reserved, analytical CPA from Kentucky. On paper, they couldn’t be more different—but from their first night talking for hours at a diner, something clicked. They talk openly about blending families with four teenage daughters, the strain that season put on their marriage, and how therapy became not a last resort but an ongoing resource. Steve reflects on learning—slowly—to speak up before resentment builds, while Colette names her own pattern of over-explaining and chasing understanding when she feels disconnected. The conversation explores how repair actually works in real marriages: who apologizes first, why pauses matter, how shame gets in the way, and why growth is measured in years—not moments. They also share what they’re navigating now: demanding careers, a major book launch, and the need to reinvest in their relationship after a season of borrowing against it. This episode is an honest look at what long-term partnership looks like when both people stay willing to learn, practice, and keep showing up—imperfectly. Key Takeaways Therapy isn’t a referee – Real change happens when each person does their own work, not when someone “wins.” Quiet creates distance – Avoiding small conversations leads to resentment and emotional shutdown. Pausing prevents damage – Taking space can be protective when emotions run hot. Repair matters more than perfection – Apologies don’t require total agreement—just ownership. Different nervous systems need different timing – One partner may need space while the other seeks immediate connection. Growth is gradual – Being better than five years ago counts—and so does staying open to future growth. Relationships require reinvestment – Work seasons drain connection unless time and intention are restored. Guest Info Colette Jane Fehr Couples therapist, speaker, podcast host, and author of The Cost of Quiet, releasing February 2026 https://www.colettejanefehr.com/new-book. Colette specializes in helping individuals and couples break patterns of avoidance and learn self-connected communication. Website: https://www.colettejanefehr.com Steve Fehr CPA and finance professional with over 30 years of experience. Steve brings a grounded, analytical perspective to conversations about communication, emotional labor, and long-term partnership. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Zach looks back on a standout year of conversations by revisiting some of the most meaningful, memorable, and instructive moments from past episodes.  Zach introduces each segment, offering context and reflection on why these moments matter and how they connect to the bigger picture of relational health. Across these clips, you’ll hear stories of intimacy rebuilt, grief held with humor, trust repaired, creativity sustained, and partnerships strengthened through intentional work. Whether you’re catching up, revisiting favorites, or discovering episodes you missed, this episode offers a thoughtful snapshot of what the show has been exploring all year: how real people do the real work of staying connected. Couples featured in this episode include: Susan & Tim Bratton — Episode 394https://marriagetherapyradio.com/ep-394 Kimberly Crossman & Tom Walsh — Episode 396https://marriagetherapyradio.com/ep-396 Karen Whitehouse & Helen McLaughlin — Episode 401https://marriagetherapyradio.com/ep-401 Tarah & EJ Kerwin — Episode 368https://marriagetherapyradio.com/ep-368 Baya Voce & Emmy Bush — Episode 374https://marriagetherapyradio.com/ep-374 Additional episodes mentioned by Zach: Victoria Shalet & Adam James — Episode 379https://marriagetherapyradio.com/ep-379 Brian & Toby — Episode 392https://marriagetherapyradio.com/ep-392 Billy & Melissa Hokacker — Episode 384https://marriagetherapyradio.com/ep-384 Jennifer & Andres — Episode 391https://marriagetherapyradio.com/ep-391 Zach’s Mom & Stepdad — Episode 383https://marriagetherapyradio.com/ep-383 Ira & Andrea — Multi-Episode Arc (Episodes 307–399)https://marriagetherapyradio.com/ep-397 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Zach sits down with Dana and Sean, a couple whose nearly 30-year relationship includes teenage pregnancy, early marriage, deep faith, repeated infidelity, and an extraordinary rebuilding process that reshaped their marriage from the ground up. Dana and Sean met as children at church, reconnected in high school, and married young after an unplanned pregnancy—long before either of them knew who they were or how marriage actually worked. Pressured by religious expectations and carrying unresolved childhood trauma, they entered marriage already fractured. What followed were years of struggle: emotional immaturity, financial stress, multiple affairs, and seasons where staying together felt impossible. Instead of walking away, they chose the slow, painful work of rebuilding. Sean entered therapy to understand himself before trying to understand his wife. Dana learned to confront her own patterns, pride, and expectations—anchoring herself in faith, presence, and radical honesty. Together, they rejected shallow answers and chose accountability, counseling, and humility. Now parents of four children (ages 26–16), Dana and Sean reflect on how faith became not a rulebook but a living presence—the “third strand” that sustained them when their marriage felt dead. They talk candidly about selfishness, stubborn hope, and why staying isn’t about endurance but about vision: building a marriage their children would actually want to emulate. This conversation is raw, grounded, and deeply hopeful—a reminder that resurrection is possible, even after years of damage. Key Takeaways Early marriage magnifies unhealed trauma – Getting married young without self-knowledge set them up for struggle from the start. Staying isn’t passive – Rebuilding required therapy, in-home separation, humility, and consistent effort from both partners. Self-work precedes relationship work – Sean learned that understanding himself was essential before he could truly love Dana. Faith as presence, not pressure – Their spirituality evolved from rigid rules to lived connection and daily surrender. Infidelity doesn’t have to be the end – While not prescribing staying, they show what repair can look like when both partners commit to real change. Love languages come from childhood – Sean gives gifts; Dana craves quality time—both rooted in how they were raised. Resurrection is real – A marriage can be “dead dead” and still come back stronger the second time around. Vision sustains commitment – They stayed not just for the kids, but to model a marriage worth choosing. Guest Info Dana is a marriage coach, speaker, and host of the podcast Rebuilding Us, where she shares honest conversations about infidelity, faith, and marriage repair. She is known for her commitment to authenticity and refusal to offer shallow advice. Website: https://danache.com/ Instagram: ⁠https://www.instagram.com/mrsdanache/?hl=en⁠ Sean is a firefighter who prefers life behind the scenes. His willingness to engage in therapy, self-reflection, and accountability played a central role in their rebuilding process. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Zach sits down with Justin and Kylie Coulson, parents of six daughters and co-creators of the Happy Families movement. What unfolds is a deeply honest conversation about failure, repair, intention, and the long road toward building a family culture that actually feels good to live in. Justin shares a pivotal early-parenting moment that became the turning point of his life: a loss of control with one of their young children that forced him to confront who he was becoming as a father and husband. Kylie describes the clarity she felt in that moment—her love for Justin alongside her unwavering commitment to her children’s safety—and how that line in the sand changed everything. From there, the conversation traces Justin’s radical career pivot from radio to psychology, the years of study and sacrifice that followed, and the birth of the Happy Families philosophy. Together, Justin and Kylie unpack what “happy” actually means—not the absence of hardship, but the presence of connection, safety, and shared joy, especially around the family table. They share the simple but powerful structures they use to stay aligned: weekly check-ins, quarterly retreats, and a three-question framework that replaces blame with collaboration. Through stories of totalled cars, hard choices, and repaired moments, Justin and Kylie show how families are built—not through perfection, but through practised responses, accountability, and love that stays bigger than the mess. Key Takeaways We always get to choose our response – Circumstances don’t dictate behavior; intention does. People matter, things don’t – Safety, connection, and relationship always come before stuff. Happy families are built, not inherited – Skills like communication, repair, and emotional regulation are learnable. Hardship doesn’t cancel happiness – Joy is found in meaning, not ease. Repair builds trust – Conflict isn’t the enemy; unresolved conflict is. Structure creates safety – Regular check-ins and retreats help families stay aligned. Blame kills collaboration – Asking “How can we support each other?” changes everything. The table is the vision – A family that wants to be together is the real measure of success. Guest Info Justin & Kylie Coulson Justin Coulson is a parenting expert, author, psychologist, and founder of Happy Families (https://happyfamilies.com.au/). He hosts Australia’s most-downloaded parenting podcast, The Happy Families Podcast, and appears on national television. Kylie Coulson is his partner in parenting and purpose, bringing clarity, steadiness, and lived wisdom to their work together. They are parents of six daughters, grandparents to one (and counting), and passionate advocates for intentional family culture. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Zach sits down with Kristan and Brook Seaford, a couple whose marriage was transformed overnight when Kristan contracted a rare and catastrophic infection in 2013. What began as strep throat and the flu quickly escalated into pneumonia, sepsis, organ failure, septic shock, and ultimately the loss of both hands, one foot, and part of the other—a 108-day medical ordeal across six hospitals that changed her life and their family forever. But what unfolds in this interview is not just a medical story—it’s a relationship story. Kristan describes the grief of returning home to a toddler who no longer recognized her, the ache of losing the physical abilities that once defined her identity, and the spiritual shift from fierce independence to complete dependence on God. Brook shares his own transformation as the family’s roles flipped overnight—learning to parent five children, run a home he once took for granted, and support a partner rebuilding her life. Together, Kristan and Brook talk about humor as survival, forgiveness as practice, community as a lifeline, and the unexpected gifts that emerged from unimaginable loss. They explore how their affection, partnership, and independence have evolved, how they’ve adapted to enjoy life together in new ways, and how their children have grown stronger, more empathetic, and more capable because of what their family lived through. Kristan now speaks publicly about resilience, faith, and healing—and this conversation demonstrates the courage and compassion at the heart of her work. Key Takeaways A medical miracle and a marital transformation – Kristan survived sepsis and organ failure, losing limbs but gaining a deeper sense of gratitude, faith, and purpose. Roles reversed overnight – Brook shifted from traditional breadwinner to full-time caregiver and household manager, discovering new respect for the invisible labor of parenting and home life. Anger and grief show up differently – She grieved deeply but rarely felt anger; he felt anger for her, mourning all that had been taken from someone he loved. Rebuilding attachment takes intention – Their 13-month-old daughter was terrified when Kristan came home—so Kristan slept on the nursery floor for months to rebuild their bond. Humor is holy – Dark humor and playful banter became a coping mechanism for both the trauma and the awkward social moments that followed. The story shaped their kids – Their five children grew more independent, responsible, and compassionate as they adapted to new family rhythms. Partnership evolves – Though physical limitations changed what activities they can share, they now intentionally seek “new fun” together—breweries, museums, comedy clubs, creative classes, and cruises instead of scuba diving. Her disability makes her a better counselor – Kristan says she isn’t a good mom, wife, or therapist despite what happened—but in many ways because of it. Guest Info Kristan Seaford Speaker, therapist, author, and survivor. Kristan shares her story of catastrophic illness, limb loss, resilience, and faith through her counseling practice and speaking engagements. Learn more at https://www.kristanseaford.com/. Brook Seaford Pastor, father, and caregiver whose perspective brings honesty, steadiness, and depth to the conversation. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices