LOVERS by Shan

Sex Is a Skill. Beducated is where you learn it. Join Beducated today at https://beducate.me/loversbyshan. 

Big love to the sponsor of this episode, CozyEarth! Head to https://cozyearth.com/LOVERS and use my code LOVERS for an exclusive 20% off.

Head to www.penguinrandomhouse.com to get your copy of Caro Claire Burke’s new book Yesteryear, a gripping, darkly funny thriller about an influencer trapped in a nightmare version of the past.

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Dondré Whitfield on why men cheat — and what nobody taught them about love.

Dondré Whitfield is an actor best known for his roles in Guiding Light, Queen Sugar, and The Game, and the author of Male vs. Man (a book about what it actually means to be a man in the context of family, fatherhood, and love). In this conversation, he traces the origin of his infidelity not to a moment of weakness but to a moment of watching his father lust after other women in plain sight (that was the day, he says, the cheater in him was born — not because he wanted to be that man, but because he didn't yet know he had a choice).

What follows is one of the most specific and honest conversations we've had on this show about what it looks like when a man finally decides to understand himself and then builds an entire framework so his children don't have to start from zero. His concept, "we date as a family" (where the whole family meets not just the person a child is dating but their father too, so everyone can help scaffold the relationship toward something healthy), is practical, radical, and worth hearing in full.

Follow Dondré Whitfield

Instagram → https://www.instagram.com/alldondre/ Website → https://www.dondrewhitfield.com/ Get Dondré's book Male vs. Man → https://a.co/d/0het8rPc

Want more Lover?

Shan’s AI trained to give you her advice → http://loversbyshan.com 

Get a free weekly Love Letter → http://loversbyshan.com/newsletter 

Join the Lovers Community → https://www.loversbyshan.com/community Explore free quizzes + worksheets → http://loversbyshan.com/quizzes
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A few weeks ago I put out the Melissa Ford episode, and the comments told me something I already knew before I hit publish: I crossed a line I claim to stand against. This is me sitting with that.

Chaos is a ladder. I've climbed it for twenty years. The only other ladder I know is love, and it's so much harder, because you have to actually feel your way up it.

I also owe a more honest version of something I said before about my life, my relationship, the joy I keep telling from the outside in instead of the inside out. So I'm saying the true thing plainly: I have an amazing love life. This is the year I stop building from fear.
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Showing some love of the sponsor of this episode #BEDucated. Join Beducated today at https://beducate.me/loversapril. 

Shout out to the sponsor of this episode #Quince. Go to Quince.com/LOVERS for free shipping and 365-day returns.

LOVERS! Right now, you can receive up to 32% off your purchase by heading to Biologica.com/LOVERS!

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Melyssa Ford has heard every version of the argument. She's seen the comments. She knows what people think about a woman her age with no husband and no kids who says she's genuinely happy. 

And she's back to say it again,  louder. In this episode, Shan and Melyssa get into the real reason so many women are quietly stepping back from traditional relationship structures, not out of bitterness, not out of trauma, but out of a clear-eyed look at what they were actually being offered. 

If you've ever felt like the options on the table weren't worth the cost, this one is for you.

Follow Melyssa Ford

→ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/melyssaford→ Watch Hot & Bothered with Melyssa Ford (YouTube): https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCgI18pIo71rZWq6upn_QxMgListen to Hot & Bothered Podcast: available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts & all major platforms
→ Get her book Allow Me to Reintroduce Myself: 13 Lessons for a Life Well Lived: https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/58631608-allow-me-to-reintroduce-myself?from_search=true&from_srp=true&qid=n6x35X4UoC&rank=1

Want more Lover?

Shan’s AI trained to give you her advice → http://loversbyshan.com 

Get a free weekly Love Letter → http://loversbyshan.com/newsletter 

Join the Lovers Community → https://www.loversbyshan.com/community 

Explore free quizzes + worksheets → http://loversbyshan.com/quizzes
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Sex Is a Skill. Beducated is where you learn it. Join the world's largest sex school and access 150+ courses for curious adults: https://beduc.at/bg2621-boody

Big love to the sponsor of this episode, Masterclass. Right now, our listeners get an additional 15% off any MasterClass annual membership at masterclass.com/lovers. 

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In this episode of Lovers, I sit down with KevOnStage and Melissa Fredericks for a conversation about the kind of partnership most people admire from a distance… but might struggle to survive in real life.

Before the success, before the tours, and before the platform, Melissa was the one carrying the financial weight of their household while Kev pursued stand-up comedy full time. She talks honestly about what it felt like to be the responsible one, why she chose not to weaponize money in their relationship, and how they built trust without keeping score.

Together, they unpack the mindset that has shaped their marriage for years: if one person fails, both people fail. If one person wins, both people win.

We also talk about resentment in long-term relationships, navigating major life transitions like perimenopause, giving your partner room to evolve, and why some of the choices that strengthened their marriage would look completely irrational to other couples.

This episode challenges modern ideas around independence, partnership, sacrifice, gender roles, and what it actually means to build a life with someone instead of simply alongside them.

If you’ve ever wondered what real partnership looks like behind the scenes, or questioned whether you’d actually be willing to make the sacrifices required for the kind of love you admire, this conversation is for you.

Follow KevOnStage & Melissa Fredericks

→ Kev's Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/kevonstage 

→ Melissa's Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mrskevonstage/?hl=en 

→ Website & Tour Dates: https://www.kevonstage.com 

→ Watch Kev’s Shows & Comedy Content https://www.youtube.com/user/KevOnStage

AND don’t miss the latest release from Kennedy Ryan upcoming novel Score → https://kennedyryanwrites.com/score/ 

Did you know Kennedy Ryan came on the podcast? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jSJxZ-XzFck 

Want more Lover?

Shan’s AI trained to give you her advice → http://loversbyshan.com 

Get a free weekly Love Letter → http://loversbyshan.com/newsletter 

Join the Lovers Community → https://www.loversbyshan.com/community 

Explore free quizzes + worksheets → http://loversbyshan.com/quizzes
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Sex Is a Skill. Beducated is where you learn it. Join the world's largest sex school and access 150+ courses for curious adults: https://beduc.at/bg2620-boody 

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In this episode of Lovers, I sit down with my sister Lauren Morrison to say something ick: we both still enjoy attention from men.

While we prepare for Mash Majesty, our section for Toronto Caribbean Carnival, we’ve been having important conversations around what carnival represents for us, and in addition to community and culture, it’s also a day to flirt with the gaze! 

In this episode, we talk about how motherhood, marriage, long-term partnership, and aging can shift the way women experience themselves socially and romantically, especially in a culture that simultaneously rewards female desirability while shaming women for acknowledging that they enjoy it.

Together, we unpack why so many women quietly miss feeling desired, why being loved and being wanted are not always the same emotional experience, and how spaces like Carnival and Mash Majesty can reconnect women to embodiment, visibility, sensuality, play, and freedom without shame.

This episode is deeply personal, but it’s also connected to the spirit behind Mash Majesty itself: creating a space where women can feel expressive, magnetic, joyful, powerful, sensual, seen, and fully alive in their bodies.

If you’ve ever questioned whether it’s shallow to enjoy attention, missed feeling desired in your relationship, or struggled with how motherhood, aging, or partnership changed the way the world responds to you, this conversation is for you.

Join us for Toronto Caribbean Carnival August 1st, 2026

https://tribal.masos.app/events/b73d9cf9-ca8b-4d97-b7c8-a2511cec0b35/sections/db97e350-5840-448f-ba03-ff461464549c

Follow Lauren Morrison

→ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/coachlaurenmorrison/→ Get Lauren’s new book https://www.amazon.com/Be-Room-Shrinking-Leading-Purpose/dp/B0FM4HGYSP→ Sign up for a free coaching consultation with Lauren https://www.beintheroomcoaching.com/work-with-lauren

Want more Lover?

Shan’s AI trained to give you her advice → http://loversbyshan.com 

Get a free weekly Love Letter → http://loversbyshan.com/newsletter 

Join the Lovers Community → https://www.loversbyshan.com/community Explore free quizzes + worksheets → http://loversbyshan.com/quizzes
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices