Are Spouses Becoming Too Selfish? What a Healthy Marriage Actually Requires That Media Isn’t Telling You: Episode 414
Are we getting too self-focused in marriage? In this episode, we unpack the cultural messages that push hyper-individualism (“fill your cup first”) and show why great marriages are actually built on mutual care, not solo self-care. We talk about healthy vs. overcorrected boundaries, why prosocial actions (doing good for your partner) boost your own mood, how to shift from short-term impulses to a long-term family vision, and practical ways to “out-love” each other in daily life. What you’ll learn from this episode: The trap of “me first” and how it quietly erodes connection Mutual care vs. self-care (and why you can’t get to 100% alone) Boundaries that protect vs. boundaries that avoid A neuroscience-backed reason to give more (and feel better) How shared vision → shared sacrifice → shared joy Simple ways to prioritize your partner without losing yourself If this helped, drop a comment with your biggest takeaway, hit 👍, and subscribe so you never miss an episode. Reviews seriously help—thank you for taking a moment to rate the show! Explore all our resources (Couples Workshop, 30-Day Challenges, guides & more): meetthefreemans.com/links Episode Timestamps of What We Discussed: 0:00 Love is a commitment (not just a feeling) 1:15 Intro & topic: Are spouses becoming too selfish? 2:41 The myth of “self first,” then the relationship 5:38 Mutual care over self-care (why you can’t get to 100% alone) 9:31 Study: prosocial acts boost mood & connection 11:48 Boundaries: healthy vs the overcorrection 14:05 F1 analogy — from beginner rules to mastery standards 17:47 Culture: hyper-individualism & consumerism in relationships 20:54 Shift to long-term vision (let the future guide today) 22:30 Family values & the erosion of the family-oriented model 28:24 Why media rarely tells you what truly strengthens marriage 30:01 Interdependence & “out-loving” each other 31:25 Choosing your partner’s needs: practical examples 32:46 Main takeaways & reminders 33:38 Love = commitment + shared vision 34:54 Closing: reviews, subscribe 35:12 Resources & sign-off
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10 Lessons From 10 Years of Marriage: The Highs, Lows, and What No One Prepares You For: Episode 413
This week marks our 10-year wedding anniversary and if we’re being honest, the months leading up to it weren’t easy. Research even shows that around the 10-year mark, couples hit peak dissatisfaction. But here’s the truth: challenges don’t mean your marriage is broken. They’re invitations to grow, reconnect, and come back stronger. In this episode, we’re opening up about the 10 most powerful lessons from our 10 years together — the highs, the lows, the laughter, and the lessons that have shaped us as individuals, as partners, and as parents. Whether you’ve been together 2 years, 20, or 50, these lessons will give you perspective, encouragement, and practical tools to stay on the same team in every season. Don’t miss this one—it might change the way you see your marriage. Relationship Resources: In honor of our 10-year anniversary, we’re keeping The Best of Us 30-Day Couples Challenge open for just a few more days! This special edition is designed to reignite emotional and physical intimacy, spark joy, and bring out the BEST in each other again. Join here: mycoupleschallenge.com/best Or explore all of our tools — from upcoming workshops to guides — at meetthefreemans.com/links 👉 If this episode gave you value, hit subscribe, drop a comment with your favorite lesson, and please leave a review so more couples can find this podcast. Episode Timestamps of What We Discuss: 0:00 – Why 10 years can be a breaking point for couples 3:20 – Lesson 1: Keep updating your shared vision 9:17 – Lesson 2: Connection is more than just being around each other 15:52 – Lesson 3: Differences can make you a stronger team 25:14 – Lesson 4: Becoming parents forces you to reconstruct your marriage 32:09 – Lesson 5: How you show up daily becomes how your marriage feels 39:37 – Lesson 6: Be more committed to repair than being right (or hurt) 47:49 – Lesson 7: Most arguments aren’t about the surface-level issue 53:03 – Lesson 8: Don’t shift from biggest supporters to biggest critics 59:59 – Lesson 9: The same challenges repeat until you learn the lesson 1:08:48 – Lesson 10: Sometimes you just need to have fun and switch the energy 1:12:43 – Final reflections after 10 years
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The Power of a Shared Vision in Marriage (And Why It Keeps You Strong Through Every Season): Episode 412
What keeps couples united through all the ups and downs? A shared vision. In this episode of the Empowered Couples Podcast, we break down why having a vision together is essential, how to define your values as a couple, and the practical steps to keep you connected in both everyday life and during challenges. Whether you’re in a hard season or just feeling stuck in routine, your vision as a couple is what pulls you out of the mundane and gives deeper meaning to your marriage. In this episode you will hear: -Why self-focus leads to more negativity (and how vision shifts that) -The 4 steps to creating a shared vision for your marriage and family -How values guide tough choices around career, parenting, and money -Ways to connect daily life back to your bigger purpose together -How to turn challenges into growth and strengthen your bond long-term 👉 Ready to reignite your intimacy and spark? Our Best of Us 30-Day Couples Challenge is only open 3x a year—don’t miss this round. Join here: https://mycoupleschallenge.com/best If you enjoy this episode, don’t forget to subscribe, leave a comment, and write us a quick review—it means the world to us and helps more couples find the podcast! Timestamps of Episode: 0:00 – Why self-focus increases negativity 0:18 – How vision helps you think beyond yourself 0:34 – The danger of losing sight of your shared values 0:47 – Making hard choices aligned with your vision 1:00 – Looking back on challenges with pride 1:19 – Welcome + episode introduction 1:55 – Why vision bonds couples from the beginning 2:14 – Losing sight of “why” in everyday life 2:38 – Announcement: The Best of Us 30-Day Challenge 3:18 – Why vision is collaborative and long-term 3:40 – The psychology of self-consciousness & negative emotion 4:23 – How lack of vision creates conflict cycles 4:39 – Seeing hard seasons in the bigger picture 5:18 – Finding meaning even in the mundane days 6:26 – Step 1: Moving from present pain to future vision 7:52 – How vision brings relief and peace 9:09 – Parenting example: values guiding hard choices 10:17 – Step 2: Defining higher values and purpose 11:25 – Career choices and money vs. vision 12:37 – Step 3: Creating a simple, memorable vision statement 13:47 – Aligning vision with values, actions, and results 15:29 – Expanding your vision beyond your family 16:06 – Vision boards and visual reminders 16:29 – Step 4: Connecting present challenges back to vision 17:09 – Real parenting example from our daughter 18:43 – Seeing challenges as stepping stones to vision 19:29 – Simple reflection questions for couples 20:18 – The Hero’s Journey and your marriage 20:38 – Looking back on challenges with pride and strength 21:07 – Who you want to become vs. what you want to achieve 21:59 – Why connection is the most fulfilling outcome 22:22 – Final reminder: Best of Us 30-Day Challenge 23:16 – Closing encouragement + subscribe & review
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Don’t Learn This Too Late: Ways to Stay Connected After Kids: Episode 411
Marriage after kids can feel like survival mode. Once out of the immediate chaos, it can settle into a state of function. Between diapers, school runs, shuttling to sports practices, your work, and endless to-do lists at home, it’s easy to put your relationship on the back burner. But here’s the truth: your kids don’t just thrive on how well you care for them—they thrive on how connected YOU are as a couple. In this episode of the Empowered Couples Podcast, Jocelyn & Aaron (“The Freemans”) share practical, real-life ways to stay emotionally and physically connected after kids. You’ll learn how to move beyond just “functioning” as roommates and bring back fulfillment, intimacy, and spark in your marriage before it’s too late. If you’ve ever felt the distance growing, this conversation will give you hope and concrete steps you can implement today. From this episode you’ll walk away with: How to make daily emotional check-ins that go beyond “How was your day?” Why non-sexual touch matters (and how to bring it back without pressure) Simple ways to make family dinners and daily routines bonding moments How to prioritize weekly and yearly quality time as a couple Why your kids benefit most when YOU thrive together Don’t just survive marriage after kids—reignite the connection that makes everything else in family life easier. Not only is this for your own satisfaction, but critical for what you then model to your kids. Want to reignite the spark and feel truly connected again? Join the Best of Us 30-Day Couples Challenge—a proven path to bring back emotional closeness, intimacy, and joy in your marriage. Enrollment only opens a few times per year, so don’t miss this round: https://mycoupleschallenge.com/best 👈 If This Episode Resonated, Don’t Forget to: -Subscribe for weekly episodes -Leave a rating & review to support the show -Share this episode with a couple who needs encouragement Episode Topics Timestamp: 00:08 – Why putting your relationship on the back burner hurts your kids too 00:09:50 – The emotional wall couples feel after building the “dream life” 00:10:38 – Why dissatisfaction peaks around the 10-year mark (and how to avoid it) 00:13:37 – Connection is what makes parenting and life easier 00:14:00 – Step 1: Daily emotional check-ins (not just logistics) 00:19:18 – Step 2: Non-sexual touch & physical affection 00:23:59 – Why kids need to SEE your love, not just receive it 00:25:02 – Special edition: The Best of Us 30-Day Challenge 00:28:11 – Step 3: Make family dinners intentional & device-free 00:32:57 – Step 4: Weekly marriage nights (beyond TV time) 00:34:44 – Step 5: Yearly getaways & bucket list adventures together 00:37:24 – The danger of drifting apart slowly 00:39:34 – Kids notice everything—why your marriage is their model 00:41:26 – Final encouragement & invitation to reignite your spark
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Marriage Intimacy Q&A: Mismatched Desire, Dry Spells, Emotional Safety & Reigniting the Spark: Episode 410
Stay on the same team, no matter the challenge you face!
Jocelyn and Aaron Freeman, known as The Freemans, are the husband-and-wife duo behind viral marriage content seen by 20M+ couples every month. Both hold Master’s degrees in Psychology, are authors, coaches, and parents... but what makes them stand out is how real and relatable their advice is. Most couples say: “Are they watching us?!”
This show gives couples the practical tools, real talk, and honest coaching that most relationships are missing. Whether you're in a tough season or just want to stay connected through the chaos of life, you'll walk away from every episode with something you can actually use.
If you're ready to improve communication, resolve conflict faster, and feel emotionally connected again, subscribe now. You’ll want to binge past episodes and never miss what’s next.
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