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Erica Gaines came into law enforcement as the Knife Girl — selling switchblades at police conferences, making small talk with cops, building relationships she didn't fully understand. She had opinions. She thought shooting someone in the leg was a reasonable ask. Then she stepped into a use-of-force simulator. One domestic violence scenario, a shock pack on her lower back, and two minutes of chaos later, she walked out shaking. That experience rewired her. She's been inside this world ever since, running TacMobility — bringing neuroscience, stress physiology, and resiliency training to law enforcement agencies across the country.
Suicide is the number one cop killer in America. Not line-of-duty deaths. Not ambushes. Not traffic stops. Only half of agencies have any wellness program at all. Of those, only 23% are teaching actual resiliency skills. We get into what that gap costs — and why wellness and resiliency aren't the same thing, and confusing them is part of the problem.
We talk about internal law enforcement culture — why officers say the body armor on their back is for their own admin. Why cynicism becomes a slow leak that doesn't stop at retirement. Why the most important thing a cop can do might be building a social circle that has nothing to do with the job. We also get into dispatchers, women in law enforcement, human trafficking in Kalispell, and what happens to your identity the day you turn in your badge.
Tacmobility: https://www.tacmobility.org
 
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Listener Q and A to close out the week. Topics are heavier than usual, but that's how it goes sometimes.
-What's in the EDC fanny pack and why
-A guy who keeps getting knocked down asks if he should keep pushing toward becoming a Marine
-Family drama with the sister-in-law is bleeding into everything, how do you protect what matters without making it worse 
-A man's mom just got a terminal cancer diagnosis. I lost my mom to cancer. I have regrets about how I handled the end of her life.
Enjoy.
 
Pick up a copy of my book Drownproof here: https://www.clearedhotpodcast.com/book
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Oscar Hagelsieb is a Mexican-American law enforcement professional known for his lengthy career in U.S. federal service focused on border security, organized crime and cartel infiltration. He grew up in a tough neighborhood on the outskirts of El Paso, Texas, the son of undocumented immigrant parents. His upbringing gave him firsthand insight into both sides of the border and influenced his decision to pursue a career in federal law enforcement.
Hagelsieb began his federal service as a U.S. Border Patrol Agent, where he worked in frontline enforcement along the U.S.–Mexico border. In that role he encountered families and migrants crossing for economic opportunity as well as experienced cartel-linked smuggling activity. 
Building on his effectiveness and his deep understanding of local culture and language, Hagelsieb transitioned into undercover work, infiltrating narcotics and human smuggling networks tied to major Mexican drug cartels. His appearance and background were strategic assets in these operations, allowing him to navigate criminal subcultures and gather actionable intelligence that led to prosecutions. 
Over time, he rose through the ranks to become the Assistant Special Agent in Charge (ASAC) of the Homeland Security Investigations (HSI) office in El Paso. In this senior leadership position, he oversaw complex investigations into transnational organized crime, cartel logistics, and cross-border smuggling operations, and managed both domestic and international law enforcement efforts. 
His work and perspective were featured in the documentary Kingdom of Shadows, which examines the human realities of the drug war and cartel influence along the border, providing rare insight into the lived experience of agents operating within these conflicts. 
 
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Four questions for today's Q and A that all center on responsibility and perspective. We start with a man in a movie theater watching someone try to enter through an emergency exit, his mind flashing back to the Aurora theater shooting and wondering ever since if he should have acted or done more. From there, a husband blindsided by his wife saying she's leaving and facing the reality of telling his two young sons. The third question comes from a man recovering from major surgery who feels useless and like a burden on his wife while he heals. We close by tackling whether it's smarter to openly acknowledge the risks young men and women face online, or ignore what is statistically unlikely but emotionally unsettling.
 
Pre-Order my upcoming book Drownproof here: 
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Brad Colbert is a retired Marine Master Sergeant with 30 years of military and government service. He served with 1st Reconnaissance Battalion in Afghanistan in 2001 and during the 2003 invasion of Iraq, where he led Marines in combat and was later depicted in Generation Kill. After retiring from active duty, he continued working in support of the Intelligence Community before shifting his focus to leadership, resilience, and veteran advocacy through The Carry On Podcast and the Recon Foundation.
We talked about combat, responsibility, and what happens when the uniform comes off. A major part of this conversation was veteran mental health and the reality that too many men are still fighting alone. Brad is working to change that. This episode is about ownership, connection, and making sure the people who served don't suffer in silence.
Find Brad Here: https://bradcolbert.us/
Today's Sponsors:
Montana Knife Company:
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David:
Buy 4 cartons and get the 5th free when you go to https://davidprotein.com/CLEAREDHOT