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Hey White Women

Podcast Hey White Women
Daniella Mestyanek Young
In this conversation, Daniella Mestyanek Young and Rebecca discuss their experiences with cults and the realization that white supremacy is a cult. They explore...

Available Episodes

5 of 30
  • Episode 30 | Speaking equitably with confidence
    In this conversation, Daniella and Rebecca delve into the complexities of cult dynamics, particularly focusing on the Nation of Islam. They explore personal experiences with cults, the intersection of race and cults, and the societal responses to these groups. The discussion highlights the role of white women in these conversations, the importance of listening and learning from diverse experiences, and the manipulative tactics employed by cults. The speakers emphasize that conflict can be a necessary part of understanding and navigating these topics, and they advocate for a more nuanced approach to discussing race and identity within the context of cults. In this conversation, Daniella and Rebecca explore the complexities of racial discussions, the importance of asking questions, and the role of community in understanding different perspectives. They delve into the nuances of consumer privilege in content creation, the challenges of neurodiversity, and the impact of cultural practices on comfort and community. The discussion also touches on the significance of authenticity, self-reflection, and the dynamics of rebranding in personal and societal contexts. Connect with Rebecca at: The White Woman Whisperer Website   The White Woman Whisperer Patreon   The White Woman Whisperer TikTok   Connect with Daniella at: You can read all about that story in my book, Uncultured-- buy signed copies here. https://bit.ly/SignedUncultured For more info on me: Patreon: https://bit.ly/YTPLanding Cult book Clubs (Advanced AND Memoirs) Annual Membership: https://bit.ly/YTPLanding Get an autographed copy of my book, Uncultured: https://bit.ly/SignedUncultured Get my book, Uncultured, from Bookshop.org: https://bit.ly/4g1Ufw8 Daniella’s Tiktok: https://bit.ly/3V6GK6k / KnittingCultLady Instagram:  https://bit.ly/4ePAOFK / daniellamyoung_  Unamerican video book (on Patreon): https://bit.ly/YTVideoBook Secret Practice video book (on Patreon): https://bit.ly/3ZswGY8 Fundraiser for Culting of America book publishing https://tr.ee/fldwYRFTJI Takeaways Conflict is not inherently negative; it can lead to growth. Understanding cults requires listening to ex-members' experiences. Cults often share similar patterns regardless of their cultural background. The intersection of race and cult dynamics is complex and nuanced. White women have a unique role in discussing race and cults. Cults manipulate societal discontent to recruit and control members. Listening to diverse experiences enriches understanding of cult dynamics. Language and perception play significant roles in how cults are viewed. Personal experiences with cults can reveal broader societal issues. Navigating conversations about race and cults requires sensitivity and awareness. Racial conversations require sensitivity and awareness. Asking questions can lead to deeper understanding. Debunking is less effective than fostering empathy. Community context is crucial in discussions about race. Consumer privilege affects how content is received. Neurodiversity brings unique challenges to social interactions. Self-discovery involves acknowledging past mistakes. Cultural practices shape our perceptions of comfort. Rebranding can obscure the true nature of organizations. Authenticity is rooted in self-awareness and reflection. Chapters 00:00 Exploring the Nation of Islam and Cult Dynamics 03:19 Patterns in Cults and Personal Experiences 06:28 Intersectionality and the Complexity of Cults 09:18 Cults, Patriarchy, and Social Movements 12:17 Navigating Conversations About Race and Cults 15:07 The Role of White Women in Discussing Cults 18:09 Understanding Intent vs. Impact in Conversations 21:09 Cultural Sensitivity and Personal Growth 24:04 Defining Experiences and the Nature of Cults 26:25 Understanding Cult Dynamics and Personal Experiences 31:17 The Intersection of Race and Cults 37:06 Navigating Conversations About Cults and Identity 42:14 The Role of Questions in Understanding Cults 47:36 Consumer Privilege and Content Creation 53:48 The Evangelizing Phase of Learning and Growth 55:05 Confronting Shame and Acknowledging Complicity 58:04 Cultural Reflections on Space and Society 01:01:21 Romanticizing Narratives and Historical Contexts 01:03:40 The Impact of Climate on Culture and Community 01:08:51 Gaslighting and Control in Systems 01:16:15 Rebranding and Authenticity in Identity 01:21:56 Listening and Respect in Conversations 01:22:32 HWW Intro 16x9.mp4 Produced by Haley Phillips
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  • Episode 29 | Faces on mountains and people in streets
    In this conversation, Daniella and Rebecca explore various themes including creativity during the COVID pandemic, the rehumanization of historical figures, the dynamics of cults and community, the complexities of whiteness and feminism, parenting approaches, and the military's cult-like nature. They also discuss cultural perspectives on purity, trauma, and binge drinking, providing a critical examination of societal norms and personal experiences. In this conversation, Rebecca and Daniella explore various themes surrounding control, access, and the societal constructs that shape our understanding of identity and responsibility. They discuss the implications of paternalism in parenting, the symbolism of monuments and skyscrapers, and the impact of light pollution on our perception of the world. The dialogue also delves into the dynamics of fatherhood, the burden of carrying identity, and the cult-like nature of corporate cultures. Throughout the conversation, they emphasize the importance of rehumanizing individuals, acknowledging historical contexts, and fostering self-assuredness in navigating complex social issues. Connect with Rebecca at: The White Woman Whisperer Website   The White Woman Whisperer Patreon   The White Woman Whisperer TikTok   Connect with Daniella at: You can read all about that story in my book, Uncultured-- buy signed copies here. https://bit.ly/SignedUncultured For more info on me: Patreon: https://bit.ly/YTPLanding Cult book Clubs (Advanced AND Memoirs) Annual Membership: https://bit.ly/YTPLanding Get an autographed copy of my book, Uncultured: https://bit.ly/SignedUncultured Get my book, Uncultured, from Bookshop.org: https://bit.ly/4g1Ufw8 Daniella’s Tiktok: https://bit.ly/3V6GK6k / KnittingCultLady Instagram:  https://bit.ly/4ePAOFK / daniellamyoung_  Unamerican video book (on Patreon): https://bit.ly/YTVideoBook Secret Practice video book (on Patreon): https://bit.ly/3ZswGY8 Takeaways Creativity can flourish even in challenging times like COVID. Rehumanizing historical figures allows for a more nuanced understanding of their actions. Cults often arise from broken systems and a search for belonging. Deconstructing whiteness involves understanding the loss of community and identity. Parenting should involve teaching children about serious topics at age-appropriate levels. The military operates under cult-like structures, often unrecognized by society. Cultural norms around purity and trauma can shape perceptions of childhood. Binge drinking is often a result of fear-based cultural practices. Community bonding often comes from shared struggles and experiences. Understanding privilege requires listening to the experiences of others. Control and access are often illusions that perpetuate colonialism. Rehumanizing conversations around violence is essential for understanding. Skyscrapers symbolize societal hierarchies and aspirations. Light pollution affects our perception of the universe and ourselves. Cultural references can provide context but also complicate identity. Fatherhood dynamics reveal societal expectations and responsibilities. Paternalism in relationships can hinder genuine connection. Communalism offers a different perspective on societal structures. The burden of carrying identity can be overwhelming. Corporate cultures often reflect cult-like behaviors and structures. Acknowledgment and accountability are crucial for growth. Navigating identity requires awareness of cultural appropriation. Permission seeking can undermine personal agency. Validation seeking can lead to inauthenticity. Self-assuredness is key to effective communication and connection. Intersectionality enriches our understanding of identity. Produced by Haley Phillips
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  • Episode 28 | Appropriation or Appropriate
    This conversation explores the intersections of capitalism, cultural identity, and the dynamics of power in relationships. The speakers discuss the gig economy as a potential alternative to traditional capitalism, the complexities of cultural appropriation, and the challenges of navigating identity as white individuals in diverse cultural spaces. They delve into the illusions of saving and the societal constructs surrounding consent and autonomy, while also addressing the role of women in patriarchal systems. The discussion highlights the importance of language, the romanticization of history, and the need for new models as patriarchy collapses. Ultimately, the conversation emphasizes the consequences of fear and control in society, particularly in relation to violence and the use of weapons. In this engaging conversation, Rebecca and Daniella explore various themes surrounding conflict resolution, community bonding, creativity, parenting, anxiety management, personal agency, cultural preservation, self-expression, trauma, and collective power. They discuss the importance of making choices that prioritize well-being over societal expectations, the joy of creating rather than consuming, and the significance of natural consequences in parenting. The dialogue also delves into the complexities of living with anxiety and the expectations placed on individuals, emphasizing the need for personal agency and the power of community in navigating challenges. Ultimately, the conversation encourages listeners to embrace joy in everyday life and to confront trauma and expectations with resilience and agency. Connect with Rebecca at: The White Woman Whisperer Website   The White Woman Whisperer Patreon   The White Woman Whisperer TikTok   Connect with Daniella at: You can read all about that story in my book, Uncultured-- buy signed copies here. https://bit.ly/SignedUncultured For more info on me: Patreon: https://bit.ly/YTPLanding Cult book Clubs (Advanced AND Memoirs) Annual Membership: https://bit.ly/YTPLanding Get an autographed copy of my book, Uncultured: https://bit.ly/SignedUncultured Get my book, Uncultured, from Bookshop.org: https://bit.ly/4g1Ufw8 Daniella’s Tiktok: https://bit.ly/3V6GK6k / KnittingCultLady Instagram:  https://bit.ly/4ePAOFK / daniellamyoung_  Unamerican video book (on Patreon): https://bit.ly/YTVideoBook Secret Practice video book (on Patreon): https://bit.ly/3ZswGY8 Takeaways The gig economy could function outside of capitalism. Cultural values are often manufactured and subjective. Women's unpaid labor significantly impacts economic measurements. Cultural appropriation raises questions about identity and authenticity. The concept of saving often perpetuates harmful narratives. Patriarchy creates a prison for women, even those in privileged positions. Consent is complex and often misunderstood in relationships. Deconstructing personal shame can lead to greater understanding. Language hierarchies reflect societal biases and perceptions. Romanticizing history often overlooks the realities of oppression. Choosing not to engage in conflict can be empowering. Community bonds are strengthened through shared struggles. Creating things brings more joy than simply consuming. Natural consequences are effective in parenting. Anxiety often stems from fear of the unknown. Personal agency is crucial in making choices. Cultural preservation should be inclusive, not exclusive. Finding joy in everyday life is essential for well-being. Permission to express oneself is often needed. Confronting trauma requires acknowledging personal narratives. Chapters 00:00 The Gig Economy and Its Alternatives 05:48 Identity and Authenticity in Music 11:50 Navigating Relationships and Power Dynamics 17:50 The Role of Consent and Autonomy 23:49 The Fall of Patriarchy and Societal Change 29:01 Understanding Historical Patterns of Mistakes 31:16 Learning from History: Avoiding Repetition 32:15 Facing Fears and Realities of Power 33:48 The Dangers of Cult Mentality 36:06 Preparing for the Worst: A Self-Fulfilling Prophecy 39:13 The Overton Window: Shifting Conversations 40:35 The Cult Leader's Apocalypse: A Crescendo of Control 41:55 The Trauma of Violence and Self-Defense 44:52 Choosing Not to Engage in Violence 47:58 Creating Bonds Through Shared Struggles 50:01 The Power of Creation Over Consumption 52:17 The Joy of Generosity and Sharing 54:32 Natural Consequences in Parenting and Life 56:40 Defensiveness and the Nature of Cults 01:01:33 Natural Consequences and Parenting 01:01:55 Living Room Kids vs. Perfect Spaces 01:03:21 The Value of Everyday Items 01:05:37 Cultural Preservation and Community 01:07:37 Dressing Up and Self-Expression 01:09:16 Opening Doors to New Perspectives 01:10:22 The Fear of Judgment and Performance 01:12:26 Permission to Create and Express 01:13:43 Agency and Personal Beliefs 01:16:23 Preparing for Disasters and Community Action 01:19:24 Confronting Anxiety and Control 01:21:00 Living with Trauma and Expectations 01:23:35 The Burden of Storytelling and Happiness Produced by Haley Phillips
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  • Episode 27 | The "Making" Money Myth
    In this conversation, Daniella and Rebecca explore the intersection of music, cult experiences, and cultural identity. They discuss how growing up in a cult influenced their music preferences, particularly the emotional suppression associated with it. The conversation delves into the complexities of cultural appropriation in the music industry, the impact of fame, and the challenges of navigating cultural identities. They reflect on their personal journeys of understanding music and the importance of community and cultural exchange in shaping their experiences. In this conversation, Rebecca and Daniella explore the dynamics of listening, attention, and the challenges faced in graduate school settings. They discuss the cultural implications of entitlement and the concept of cancel culture, emphasizing the importance of understanding consequences. The dialogue shifts to the value of community and diverse experiences, critiquing the traditional notions of authority and work. They advocate for a gig economy that fosters connection and collaboration, while also addressing the isolation prevalent in modern society. The conversation culminates in a critique of the myth of making money and the need for a relational revolution to combat loneliness and foster community. Connect with Rebecca at: The White Woman Whisperer Website   The White Woman Whisperer Patreon   The White Woman Whisperer TikTok   Connect with Daniella at: You can read all about that story in my book, Uncultured-- buy signed copies here. https://bit.ly/SignedUncultured For more info on me: Patreon: https://bit.ly/YTPLanding Cult book Clubs (Advanced AND Memoirs) Annual Membership: https://bit.ly/YTPLanding Get an autographed copy of my book, Uncultured: https://bit.ly/SignedUncultured Get my book, Uncultured, from Bookshop.org: https://bit.ly/4g1Ufw8 Daniella’s Tiktok: https://bit.ly/3V6GK6k / KnittingCultLady Instagram:  https://bit.ly/4ePAOFK / daniellamyoung_  Unamerican video book (on Patreon): https://bit.ly/YTVideoBook Secret Practice video book (on Patreon): https://bit.ly/3ZswGY8 Takeaways Daniella shares her journey of discovering music after leaving a cult. The emotional suppression in cults affects music preferences and emotional expression. Country music was a safe choice for Daniella as she navigated her new environment. Cultural appropriation in music is a complex issue that involves race and identity. Fame in the music industry can lead to a false sense of success and healing. The conversation highlights the importance of community in cultural exchange. Daniella reflects on the anti-identity experienced in cults and its impact on her life. The role of race in music preferences and cultural narratives is explored. Daniella's realization of the need to understand music beyond her initial experiences. The discussion emphasizes the importance of being open to learning about different cultures.  Listening requires more than just attention; it demands engagement. In graduate school, many feel compelled to speak up rather than listen. Entitlement in American culture often leads to a lack of accountability. Cancel culture is a response to the introduction of consequences. The burden of proof often falls unfairly on marginalized voices. Community and shared experiences enhance understanding and connection. Experience should be valued over mere years in a position. The gig economy offers opportunities for community-based living. Isolation is a significant issue in modern society, exacerbated by capitalism. The myth of making money perpetuates a cycle of exploitation. Chapters 00:00 The Journey from Cult to Mainstream Music 03:50 Emotional Suppression and Music's Role 06:49 Cultural Identity and Music Choices 09:48 The Impact of Fame and Success 12:45 Cultural Appropriation in the Music Industry 15:41 Navigating Identity and Acceptance 18:40 The Pressure of Success and Perfectionism 21:44 Community, Inclusion, and Cultural Understanding 27:02 Growing Up in a Cult: Isolation and Discovery 29:25 Navigating Cultural Identity and Music 30:35 Understanding Cultural Appropriation and Joy 32:37 Satanic Panic and Cultural Misunderstandings 34:25 Deconstructing Cult Teachings and Racial Bias 35:47 The Impact of Anti-Identity on Self-Perception 40:03 Consequences of Actions and Cancel Culture 41:54 The Illusion of American Exceptionalism 44:17 Listening and Engaging in Community Conversations 46:49 The Burden of Proof in Conversations 52:09 Navigating Criticism and Defending Identity 59:37 Weaponizing Experience and Identity 01:01:47 Debating Authority and Experience 01:03:51 The Value of Diverse Experiences 01:06:18 Cults, Community, and Isolation 01:10:29 Rethinking Work and Community 01:13:29 Corporate Culture and Community 01:17:16 The Myth of Job Security 01:20:52 The Importance of Community 01:25:25 Empowerment Through Creation Produced by Haley Phillips
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  • Episode 26 | You Don't Have to "Get" Kendrick Lamar
    This conversation explores the cultural significance of Kendrick Lamar's Super Bowl performance, delving into themes of resistance, identity, and the complexities of race and gender in America. The speakers discuss the symbolism in music and dance as forms of cultural expression and resistance, the role of white women in social change, and the importance of resilience in the face of societal challenges. They also reflect on the dynamics of privilege and the need for a deeper understanding of identity and humanity in the context of systemic oppression. In this conversation, Rebecca and Daniella explore themes of diversity, gender roles, and the dynamics of conservatism versus liberalism. They discuss the impact of fear on compliance and resistance, the complexity of identity, and the importance of understanding fear in the context of freedom. The conversation also touches on the significance of diversity in society and the nuances of cultural appropriation and authenticity. In this conversation, Daniella and Rebecca explore various themes surrounding leadership, identity, and community dynamics. They discuss the importance of surrounding oneself with diverse perspectives, the complexities of multitasking in gender roles, and the journey of deconstructing personal identity. The dialogue also touches on the significance of humanity in confrontational situations, the impact of fear and panic on community responses, and the necessity of rehumanizing individuals in power dynamics. Ultimately, they emphasize the power of cultural engagement and the potential for radical acts of humanity to foster change. Connect with Rebecca at: The White Woman Whisperer Website   The White Woman Whisperer Patreon   The White Woman Whisperer TikTok   Connect with Daniella at: You can read all about that story in my book, Uncultured-- buy signed copies here. https://bit.ly/SignedUncultured For more info on me: Patreon: https://bit.ly/YTPLanding Cult book Clubs (Advanced AND Memoirs) Annual Membership: https://bit.ly/YTPLanding Get an autographed copy of my book, Uncultured: https://bit.ly/SignedUncultured Get my book, Uncultured, from Bookshop.org: https://bit.ly/4g1Ufw8 Daniella’s Tiktok: https://bit.ly/3V6GK6k / KnittingCultLady Instagram:  https://bit.ly/4ePAOFK / daniellamyoung_  Unamerican video book (on Patreon): https://bit.ly/YTVideoBook Secret Practice video book (on Patreon): https://bit.ly/3ZswGY8 Takeaways Kendrick Lamar's performance is rich in cultural symbolism. Dance and music serve as powerful forms of resistance. The focus should be on resistance rather than opposition. Survival under fascism is a reality for many. White women have a crucial role in social change. Aging should be embraced as a part of life. Chapters 00:00 Cultural Reflections on Kendrick Lamar's Performance 06:04 The Power of Resistance Over Opposition 11:57 The Role of White Women in Social Change 14:58 Aging, Resilience, and Future Planning 17:56 The Distinction Between Believing in Yourself and Believing Yourself 21:11 Cultural Narratives and the Price of Privilege 23:56 Understanding the Dynamics of Power and Control 27:01 Navigating the Complexities of Identity and Humanity 32:13 Diversity and Gender Roles in Society 34:06 The Cult of Conservatism vs. Liberalism 36:02 Fear, Compliance, and Resistance 39:19 Understanding Fear and Its Impact 42:21 The Complexity of Fear and Freedom 44:35 Navigating Anxiety and Control 46:46 Ego Death and the Complexity of Identity 49:05 Role Models vs. Soul Models 51:21 Cultural Appropriation and Authenticity 56:31 Diversity and Its Importance in Society 01:04:13 The Power of Perspective in Leadership 01:05:00 Multitasking and Gender Dynamics 01:06:29 Deconstructing Identity and Anti-Identity 01:08:47 Navigating Professional Identity and Personal Choice 01:10:35 Conformity and Cultural Identity 01:12:47 The Role of Humanity in Confrontation 01:15:20 Fear, Panic, and Community Response 01:18:27 Consequences of Actions and Community Solidarity 01:20:57 Rehumanizing the Other 01:23:55 Radical Acts of Humanity 01:25:36 Cultural Beef vs. Personal Hate Produced by Haley Phillips    
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About Hey White Women

In this conversation, Daniella Mestyanek Young and Rebecca discuss their experiences with cults and the realization that white supremacy is a cult. They explore the stages of leaving a cult and the process of deconstructing white supremacy. They also discuss the concept of white privilege and the need for white people to deprogram from the myth of white supremacy. They highlight the importance of understanding and acknowledging racism and the role of white people in dismantling white supremacy. They also touch on the parallels between cult dynamics and societal systems. The conversation explores the importance of recognizing and dismantling white supremacy within oneself and society. It emphasizes the need for white women to actively engage in anti-racism work and challenge their own biases.
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