The Divorce Survival Guide Podcast

Mediation can feel confusing, intimidating, and wildly misunderstood, especially when you're being told you "don't need a lawyer" because you're mediating." That's exactly why I invited my good friend and colleague Susan Guthrie back to the show. Susan is going to help break down what mediation actually is, how it works, and how to protect yourself in the process. Susan is a former family law attorney, longtime mediator, and the host of the podcast Divorce & Beyond. She's also my go-to expert when my clients have questions about mediation. In this conversation, Susan and I walk through what mediation really looks like from the very beginning, why mediators are not judges, and why having a consulting attorney is still essential even if you are fully committed to mediating.  When you are mediating, the only people who make decisions are the people getting divorced. Nothing is decided unless both of you agree, and that's what gives the process its power. When mediation is done well, it creates space for clarity, informed choices, and agreements you can actually live with, not decisions handed down by someone who doesn't know your life. What you'll hear about in this episode: Misconceptions about mediation and why many misunderstand the process (3:36) Why you must have a consulting attorney, even if you are mediating (15:40) Different forms of mediation, including the benefits of shuttle mediation (27:08) What the mediation process actually looks like from the start (46:40) Bringing other professionals into mediation can save time, money, and conflict (51:54) How to know when mediation is not working and who gets to make that decision (55:24) ✨ If you'd like to watch the video version of this episode, you can find it here. Learn more about Susan Guthrie: Susan Guthrie, Esq. is one of the nation's leading voices in family law and mediation. With more than 30 years of experience as a top divorce attorney, mediator, and trainer, Susan has helped thousands of individuals and families navigate separation with dignity, clarity, and compassion. As the creator and host of the award-winning Divorce & Beyond Podcast, Susan has built one of the most trusted platforms for real conversations about divorce, healing, and new beginnings. Her expertise and approachable style have made her a sought-after media expert, featured on The Oprah Podcast, NewsNation, NBC's Chicago Today, and numerous other national and regional outlets. Beyond her media appearances, Susan is a respected educator and speaker, regularly training professionals in mediation, communication, and practice development across the country. She is also a best-selling author, sharing practical insights that help individuals and professionals alike navigate change with confidence. Susan's work bridges legal knowledge, emotional intelligence, and innovative thinking — helping people not only end their marriages more peacefully but also begin their next chapters with purpose. Resources & Links: Get Your Curated Podcast PlaylistFocused Strategy Sessions with Kate The Divorce Survival Guide Resource BundlePhoenix Rising: A Divorce Empowerment CollectiveKate on InstagramKate on FacebookKate's Substack Newsletter: Divorce Coaching Dispatch The Divorce Survival Guide Podcast Episodes are also available YouTube! Susan's websiteThe Divorce and Beyond Podcast =================== DISCLAIMER:  THE COMMENTARY AND OPINIONS AVAILABLE ON THIS PODCAST ARE FOR INFORMATIONAL AND ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES ONLY AND NOT FOR THE PURPOSE OF PROVIDING LEGAL OR PSYCHOLOGICAL ADVICE.  YOU SHOULD CONTACT AN ATTORNEY, COACH, OR THERAPIST IN YOUR STATE TO OBTAIN ADVICE WITH RESPECT TO ANY PARTICULAR ISSUE OR PROBLEM. =================== Episode link: https://kateanthony.com/podcast/episode-348-divorce-mediation-explained-what-it-is-and-how-it-works-with-susan-guthrie-esq/

The holidays have a magical way of triggering every wound you've ever had. In this solo episode, I'm sharing how you can take care of yourself so you don't lose your mind, your center, or your sanity in the process. Whether this is your first holiday season post separation, you're holding it together until January to file, or you're already divorced and juggling co-parenting, conflict, grief, or the pressure to make everything look "fine," nothing you're feeling means you're a bad mom or a bad person. It means you're human, and you deserve far more gentleness than you've ever been taught to give yourself. You'll hear me walk you through the predictable triggers and patterns that show up this time of year and why the holidays feel so damn hard. And together, we'll shift into a new way of moving through the season that protects your peace and honors your truth.  What you'll hear about in this episode: The predictable patterns and triggers that show up every holiday season What your holiday reactions are actually rooted in and why they feel so overwhelming A new way of approaching the season that protects your peace and honors your truth Seven practical ways to care for yourself so you stay connected instead of collapsing under the pressure ✨ If you'd like to watch the video version of this episode, you can find it here. Resources & Links: Get Your Curated Podcast PlaylistFocused Strategy Sessions with Kate The Divorce Survival Guide Resource BundlePhoenix Rising: A Divorce Empowerment CollectiveKate on InstagramKate on FacebookKate's Substack Newsletter: Divorce Coaching Dispatch The Divorce Survival Guide Podcast Episodes are also available YouTube! =================== DISCLAIMER:  THE COMMENTARY AND OPINIONS AVAILABLE ON THIS PODCAST ARE FOR INFORMATIONAL AND ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES ONLY AND NOT FOR THE PURPOSE OF PROVIDING LEGAL OR PSYCHOLOGICAL ADVICE.  YOU SHOULD CONTACT AN ATTORNEY, COACH, OR THERAPIST IN YOUR STATE TO OBTAIN ADVICE WITH RESPECT TO ANY PARTICULAR ISSUE OR PROBLEM. Episode link: https://kateanthony.com/podcast/episode-347-when-the-holidays-trigger-every-old-wound-how-to-get-through-without-losing-yourself/  

This episode is about the loneliness women feel inside of relationships and how that loneliness can cut deeper than anything else, even when someone is sitting right next to you. If you've been moving through your days feeling invisible, misunderstood, or emotionally starved inside your own home, please hear me when I say this: you are not alone. Loneliness in marriage has become one of the most common and most deeply painful experiences women quietly carry. Throughout this episode, you'll hear me talk about the female loneliness epidemic inside relationships and why the loneliness you feel is not a personal failure. It is your body, your intuition, and your unmet needs trying to get your attention in the most honest way they know how. I also share seven grounding steps that can help you gently validate your own experience, reconnect with what you truly need, and begin rebuilding emotional safety from the inside out. As I always say, you, my love, deserve to be happy. What you'll hear about in this episode: How emotional labor conditions women into feeling disconnected and unseen The somatic signs of emotional deprivation and what your body is quietly trying to tell you Seven gentle grounding steps to help you validate your reality and rebuild emotional safety How to recognize the difference between a temporary rut and the deeper experience of chronic loneliness Why the loneliness you feel may be a sign that you are waking up to your truth, not breaking down Resources & Links: Get Your Curated Podcast PlaylistFocused Strategy Sessions with Kate The Divorce Survival Guide Resource BundlePhoenix Rising: A Divorce Empowerment CollectiveKate on InstagramKate on FacebookKate's Substack Newsletter: Divorce Coaching Dispatch The Divorce Survival Guide Podcast Episodes are also available YouTube! =================== DISCLAIMER:  THE COMMENTARY AND OPINIONS AVAILABLE ON THIS PODCAST ARE FOR INFORMATIONAL AND ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES ONLY AND NOT FOR THE PURPOSE OF PROVIDING LEGAL OR PSYCHOLOGICAL ADVICE.  YOU SHOULD CONTACT AN ATTORNEY, COACH, OR THERAPIST IN YOUR STATE TO OBTAIN ADVICE WITH RESPECT TO ANY PARTICULAR ISSUE OR PROBLEM. =================== Episode link: https://kateanthony.com/podcast/episode-346-the-female-loneliness-epidemic/

Enjoy this encore episode as I walk you through a big one: navigating the holidays during divorce. The holidays can feel like walking an emotional tightrope while trying to hold onto some joy. Whether it's your first holiday season after divorce, your last one as a family before separating, or you've been navigating holidays in divorce for a while, it's a time that stirs up all the emotions.  Wherever you are in this process, I want you to know that you're not alone. Also, were the holidays stress-free before divorce? Probably not. This episode isn't just about surviving the holidays, it's about reclaiming them in a way that works for you and your kids. Get emotionally prepared, collaborate where it counts, and make choices that put your kids at the heart of it all.  In this episode, I also explore: Self-care survival to ensure you're showing up for yourself and your kids Creating new traditions that align with who you are now Navigating the tricky question of whether to celebrate together "for the kids" Practical co-parenting strategies for gift-giving, scheduling, and prioritizing your children Resources & Links: Focused Strategy Sessions with Kate The Divorce Survival Guide Resource BundlePhoenix Rising: A Divorce Empowerment CollectiveKate on InstagramKate on FacebookKate's Substack Newsletter: Divorce Coaching Dispatch The Divorce Survival Guide Podcast Episodes are also available YouTube! =================== DISCLAIMER: THE COMMENTARY AND OPINIONS AVAILABLE ON THIS PODCAST ARE FOR INFORMATIONAL AND ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES ONLY AND NOT FOR THE PURPOSE OF PROVIDING LEGAL OR PSYCHOLOGICAL ADVICE. YOU SHOULD CONTACT AN ATTORNEY, COACH, OR THERAPIST IN YOUR STATE TO OBTAIN ADVICE WITH RESPECT TO ANY PARTICULAR ISSUE OR PROBLEM.  

If you've gone through divorce, are contemplating it, or you're smack in the messy middle, you already know: one of the hardest parts isn't the paperwork. It's learning how the hell to communicate with your ex. This is someone you likely have a lot of emotional heat with: toxic, irritating, disappointing, or all of the above and communication might even be one of the reasons you're not together anymore. And if you share kids? The communication doesn't end just because the relationship does. You still have to find a way to talk calmly, clearly, and with as much emotional self-protection as possible. That's why I brought on today's guests:Tessa Noel and Heather Ruiz from Talking Parents, a platform designed to reduce the chaos, conflict, and emotional landmines that come with co-parenting. Tessa is a certified divorce transition coach and a co-parent who's lived through a brutally high-conflict divorce. Heather brings 20+ years of communications and leadership experience, and her own co-parenting journey, to the work she does shaping Talking Parents' mission. At the end of the day, healthy communication isn't about fixing your ex, it's about reclaiming your power and creating the calm your kids need. ✨ If you'd like to watch the video version of this episode, you can find it here. What you'll hear about in this episode: The biggest mistakes people make when they first start co-parenting with a difficult or high-conflict ex (11:45) Real-life communication patterns that support healthier outcomes for kids (16:00) How boundaries changed everything for Tessa and why Heather says they're essential to set early, even when things feel amicable (23:45) Tessa's children's book Stella's Two Homes and how it helps kids navigate two-household families (28:45) Learn more about Tessa Noel and Heather Ruiz: Tessa Noel is a certified divorce transition and recovery coach with extensive knowledge in multiple life coaching frameworks. She holds a degree from California State University of San Marcos and has firsthand experience in the family courts of California. Tessa is also a co-parent with two children. In her free time, she loves to take them on adventures around their home state of California. With over 20 years in marketing and communication, Heather Ruiz is at the forefront of software services as TalkingParents Marketing Director, shaping the narrative around a pivotal time when digital platforms are redefining how co-parents coordinate, collaborate, and care for their children. Resources & Links: Focused Strategy Sessions with Kate The Divorce Survival Guide Resource BundlePhoenix Rising: A Divorce Empowerment CollectiveKate on InstagramKate on FacebookKate's Substack Newsletter: Divorce Coaching Dispatch The Divorce Survival Guide Podcast Episodes are also available YouTube! Talking Parents Talking Parents on Facebook Talking Parents on Instagram Talking Parents on LinkedIn Talking Parents on TikTok Talking  Parents on YouTube Tessa on Instagram Stella's Two Homes =================== DISCLAIMER:  THE COMMENTARY AND OPINIONS AVAILABLE ON THIS PODCAST ARE FOR INFORMATIONAL AND ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES ONLY AND NOT FOR THE PURPOSE OF PROVIDING LEGAL OR PSYCHOLOGICAL ADVICE.  YOU SHOULD CONTACT AN ATTORNEY, COACH, OR THERAPIST IN YOUR STATE TO OBTAIN ADVICE WITH RESPECT TO ANY PARTICULAR ISSUE OR PROBLEM. Episode link: https://kateanthony.com/podcast/episode-345-how-to-communicate-with-your-ex-without-losing-your-mind-with-the-pros-at-talking-parents/