Send us a textHave you ever felt completely stuck despite having obvious solutions right in front of you? That paralyzing sense of "why even try?" might not be who you truly are—it could be learned helplessness, a psychological condition that's become a silent epidemic.Learned helplessness sneaks into every corner of our lives. It's what makes you give up on healthy eating after multiple failed diets, convinces you that toxic relationships are all you deserve, or stops you from applying for jobs after too many rejections. But the most dangerous part? We don't recognize it happening. Our brains, designed for survival, interpret patterns of disappointment as evidence that effort is pointless. Soon, this conditioning becomes our identity.This episode dives deep into what I call the "figure-out-ability factor"—the critical skill of solving your own problems rather than waiting for rescue. I share a revealing story about refusing to be someone's human alarm clock and why true growth happens when we stop enabling helplessness in ourselves and others. The science of neuroplasticity offers hope: if helplessness can be learned, power can be learned too. Through awareness, small wins, environmental shifts, and interrupting negative thought patterns, you can literally rewire your brain from helplessness to possibility.Ready for a breakthrough? My challenge to you is simple but powerful: identify where learned helplessness operates in your life, then take ONE small action today. Don't overthink it—set the alarm, drink the water, have the hard conversation, or just Google the answer instead of asking someone else. Prove to yourself that you are not powerless. Because helplessness may be learned, but so is freedom—and it's time you claimed yours. Share this episode with someone who needs this message, and let me know what small win you're claiming today!
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Growing Through Resistance: Why Most People Quit Right Before the Breakthrough
Send us a textEver find yourself on the verge of quitting right when you're about to breakthrough? That's exactly where I found myself recently, walking through rain—both literally and figuratively—while wrestling with personal struggles and professional milestones simultaneously.The hardest truth I've learned is that resistance isn't telling us to stop—it's actually our compass pointing toward growth. When my world felt like it was falling apart while reaching a business milestone I'd worked toward for years, I had to make a choice: let circumstances break me or let them transform me. On that rain-soaked walk, nothing around me changed, but everything within me shifted.Through this experience, I've discovered three powerful strategies for pushing through resistance that I'm sharing with you today. First, reframe resistance as a sign you're on the right track rather than a signal to retreat. Second, commit to doing the small, hard things anyway—those uncomfortable actions build your capacity rep by rep. Finally, anchor yourself in faith and vision, remembering that even messy steps count toward your growth. The only people who don't reach their breakthrough are those who quit in the middle, letting their ego convince them that avoiding disappointment is safer than embracing discomfort.What resistance are you facing right now? What breakthrough are you chasing? Take a screenshot of this episode, tag me, and let me know—because naming it is the first step to moving through it. Your comfort zone will lie to you, but the life you want is waiting on the other side of resistance. Stop quitting on yourself before it gets good.
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The Prison Journal Ep 2: "The Strip Search and Opal"
Send us a textThe moment I opened my mother's handwritten prison journal from 1993, I knew this wasn't just about uncovering her story – it was about breaking generational chains of shame that keep us all silent.Reading her perfect cursive now as a 43-year-old mother myself feels wildly different than anything my 11-year-old self could have processed when it was happening in real time. Her words leap off the page like she's sitting across from me, coffee in hand, catching me up on everything I missed. What's uncanny is how the dates in her journal – June and July 1993 – align perfectly with our calendar today, 32 years later to the day.Through her eyes, I'm witnessing not just her experience at Mariana Women's Federal Prison Camp, but the stories of forgotten women like Opal, a grandmother who received a 54-month sentence for a first-time offense while men sentenced before her for attempted murder got mere probation. My mother's descriptions capture both the dehumanizing aspects of incarceration and the beautiful ways women showed up for each other – sharing toiletries, finding humor in brown uniforms and orthopedic shoes, discovering discarded tennis shoes in trash cans, and building community when everything else was taken away.This mini-series isn't about redemption stories with neat endings. It's about exposing what still needs change in our justice system, giving voice to the voiceless, and creating space for your story too. Because the question remains: who is hurting because you're hiding, and what secrets are keeping you sick? We don't heal in hiding around here. So whether you're carrying something that was never yours or a chapter you've been too scared to open, let this be your invitation to finally break free.
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Unpacking My Mother's Prison Diary: The Journal, Ep.1
Send us a textWhat happens when you finally open the box you've been dragging for 19 years? That's exactly what I explore in this deeply personal episode as I reveal a family secret I've held close for decades—my mother's prison journal.When I was just eleven years old, my world changed forever as my mother was sentenced to federal prison for embezzling money from a Birmingham coal company. That day in the courtroom remains crystal clear: the judge's bench, the discussion about shackling, the crushing weight of confusion and fear. Weekend drives to see her at Marianna Federal Prison. The smell of popcorn in the visiting room. The crocheted bears she mailed home. And beneath it all, the suffocating silence of shame I carried, terrified my private Christian school friends would discover my family's dark truth.For nearly two decades since her passing, I've carried her prison writings from apartment to apartment, city to city—a manila folder filled with loose-leaf pages of her raw, honest reflections. Something recently shifted, compelling me to finally peel back these layers of generational trauma. I'm only three days into transcribing her words and already it's both wrecking and healing me simultaneously. Her humor, faith, and humanity shine through experiences ranging from cafeteria shoes pulled from trash cans to spiritual breakthroughs beside prison bunk beds.This mini-series isn't about drama or backstory—it's about breaking cycles of silence and shame that perhaps you recognize in your own life. Maybe you're carrying your own version of boxed-up trauma, thinking if you just keep moving, you'll never have to open it. But those unopened chapters wait for us, and I'm discovering they don't always destroy us—sometimes they set us free. Join me page by page, truth by truth, as we explore how family secrets shape us and how confronting them might be our path to healing. If you're holding something heavy, perhaps this is your sign to open it too.
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The Reel That Triggered the Internet (and Set Me Free): Pro tips on Projection
Send us a textHave you ever dimmed your light because someone else couldn't handle your shine? In this raw, powerful episode, I'm taking you behind the scenes of what happened when my celebratory weight loss reel went viral – and not always in the kindest corners of the internet.When the comments started flooding in, some supportive but many cruel, I discovered something fascinating: the version of me from five years ago would have crumbled, deleted the post, and apologized for taking up space. But the woman I am today? She stood tall, unfazed, and even more determined to shine. That transformation isn't just about confidence – it's about understanding the psychology of projection and finally freeing yourself from the exhausting work of managing other people's discomfort with your growth.I'm sharing the hard-won lessons that changed everything for me: why you must stop shrinking yourself to fit inside someone else's comfort zone, how to recognize when someone's reaction has nothing to do with you, and why "let them" (inspired by Mel Robbins) might become your new power mantra. Through my own story of being silenced for years after being called a narcissist for speaking up, you'll see how healing doesn't mean you stop triggering people – it means you're finally okay when you do.Whether you're healing your relationship with your body, your voice, or your right to exist unapologetically, this episode is your permission slip to take up space. Your truth, your growth, and your joy are not up for debate. Tag me and let me know what this episode unlocked for you, and share it with anyone who needs to hear that their light isn't meant to be dimmed.
Welcome to She Lost It, the podcast for anyone ready to let go of what’s been weighing them down and step into a life they truly love. I’m Stefani—an accidental health coach, entrepreneur, mom, and someone who knows what it’s like to lose it all, start over, and come out stronger.In this first episode, I’m sharing my story—the raw, real, and sometimes messy truth about how I went from drowning in anxiety, debt, food addiction, and people-pleasing to finally taking control of my life. But this podcast isn’t just about my journey—it’s about yours.Each episode, I’ll share practical tips to help you break free from the patterns holding you back, whether it’s your mindset, your habits, or the stories you’ve been telling yourself. We’ll talk about what it takes to build grit, find your voice, and create a life that feels truly authentic.Think of this as a conversation between friends—the kind where you leave feeling lighter, inspired, and ready to take action. So if you’re ready to lose what’s been keeping you stuck and gain a whole new perspective, hit play. Let’s do this together.
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