Codependency Alchemy: The Podcast

• Why fixing their mood doesn’t fix you

  Do you ever feel like it’s your job to make your partner (or kids, or parents) feel better when they’re upset? In this episode of Codependency Alchemy, we explore the codependent pattern of taking responsibility for someone else’s emotions and how it leaves you feeling resentful, anxious, and disconnected from yourself. I share how to shift from fixing their discomfort to creating safety within yourself, and we practice a real-time shadow work and somatic inner child exercise to help you break the cycle.This episode is for you if:* You immediately spring into action when your partner seems grumpy.* You believe making them feel better will give you peace or safety.* You feel resentful after trying to “fix” their mood.* You’re ready to learn tools that help you meet your discomfort instead of abandoning yourself.The real invitation is to ask yourself: is your partner asking you to fix their mood? The belief that “if I make them better, I’ll feel safe” is an old survival strategy, and we can appreciate how it supported you at one point in time but it doesn’t actually work in your adult relationships. In fact, it often leaves you more anxious, frustrated, or resentful. The real alchemy happens when you take all the energy you’d spend on fixing them and pour it into caring for yourself.🌟 Special Podcast Listener Offer: Join the Codependency Alchemy Membership today and get 40% off!→ Click here to claim your discount and join now!💬 Get Community Support: Join our vibrant, supportive chat community and get real-time guidance on your healing journey. → Join the chat✨ Free Shadow Work & Inner Child Guide: Ready to deepen your healing with a step-by-step guide?→ Download my FREE guide🎥 Watch 9+ Powerful Masterclasses: Access practical tools, guided exercises, and transformative teachings to help you heal codependency and build healthier relationships. → Exclusive Masterclass Library✍🏾 From My Journal: Intimate insights and reflections directly from my personal healing journey.→ Read my latest journal entries💎 Explore "The Gems": Browse curated free resources filled with practical wisdom and actionable insights designed to support your growth and healing. → Get your free resources here This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit alyssaaazander.substack.com/subscribe

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• The shadow side of comfort zones

  Do you ever notice how even when you know something isn’t working — the job, the relationship, the habit — you still put off making the change? In this episode of Codependency Alchemy, I share what I’ve been navigating around stepping away from being the “fixer,” why we cling to what feels familiar even when it drains us, and how to use shadow work and inner child healing to move through the fear of the unknown.This episode is for you if:* You’re afraid that making a change means you’ll lose people or end up alone.* You keep waiting for the “right time” to make a move, but it never comes.* You feel stuck in old patterns of caretaking or people-pleasing.* You’re ready to learn tools that help you feel safe enough to choose differently.Whether we like it or not, not making a change is also a choice— and it often gives us the very opposite of what we think it will. We tell ourselves staying the same will bring safety or stability, but it usually leaves us with guilt, anxiety, and exhaustion. The medicine here is compassion. When you hold that part of you with love and say, “Of course you’re afraid,” you create the safety you need to move forward.🌟 Special Podcast Listener Offer: Join the Codependency Alchemy Membership today and get 40% off!→ Click here to claim your discount and join now!💬 Get Community Support: Join our vibrant, supportive chat community and get real-time guidance on your healing journey. → Join the chat✨ Free Shadow Work & Inner Child Guide: Ready to deepen your healing with a step-by-step guide?→ Download my FREE guide🎥 Watch 9+ Powerful Masterclasses: Access practical tools, guided exercises, and transformative teachings to help you heal codependency and build healthier relationships. → Exclusive Masterclass Library✍🏾 From My Journal: Intimate insights and reflections directly from my personal healing journey.→ Read my latest journal entries💎 Explore "The Gems": Browse curated free resources filled with practical wisdom and actionable insights designed to support your growth and healing. → Get your free resources here This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit alyssaaazander.substack.com/subscribe

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• The fear that almost ruined my relationship (and the lesson that saved it)

  A year ago today, Justin and I got kicked off a flight, and what could have been a total meltdown moment turned into one of the biggest relationship lessons of my life. Over pints in the Amsterdam airport, I realized I’d been carrying the same fear in new clothing and it was quietly robbing me of experiencing the love I already had in my relationship.In this episode, I share the full story and the mind-shattering epiphany that cracked me open: why trying to control your partner’s future resentment (or cheating, or rejection) only keeps you stuck, and how softening, trusting, and letting yourself be supported can actually transform your relationship.This episode is for you if:* You find yourself bracing for impact instead of enjoying the present.* Money, resentment, or “what if” fears creep into your love life.* You tend to control, fix, or over-function to feel safe.* You’re ready to experience what happens when you stop gripping and let yourself be held.This isn’t just a travel story, it’s how you can stop letting fear control your relationship and finally feel the safety and joy you’ve been craving.🌟 Special Podcast Listener Offer: Join the Codependency Alchemy Membership today and get 40% off!→ Click here to claim your discount and join now!💬 Get Community Support: Join our vibrant, supportive chat community and get real-time guidance on your healing journey. → Join the chat✨ Free Shadow Work & Inner Child Guide: Ready to deepen your healing with a step-by-step guide?→ Download my FREE guide🎥 Watch 9+ Powerful Masterclasses: Access practical tools, guided exercises, and transformative teachings to help you heal codependency and build healthier relationships. → Exclusive Masterclass Library✍🏾 From My Journal: Intimate insights and reflections directly from my personal healing journey.→ Read my latest journal entries💎 Explore "The Gems": Browse curated free resources filled with practical wisdom and actionable insights designed to support your growth and healing. → Get your free resources here This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit alyssaaazander.substack.com/subscribe

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• When triggers show up in healthy relationships

  Do you ever wonder why you still feel triggered, even in a healthy relationship? In this live episode of Codependency Alchemy, I share what I’ve been navigating with my partner around boundaries, conflict, and the uncomfortable truth that our partners can’t always meet us the way we want. We explore what to do when one person needs space and the other wants resolution now, why codependency pulls us toward fawning, and how to use inner child healing to find safety in yourself instead of demanding it from someone else.This episode is for you if:* You feel activated even in a good relationship and don’t know why.* You and your partner want opposite things in conflict (space vs. talk now).* You tend to shut down, over-explain, or fawn to avoid tension.* You’re ready to learn practices that bring compassion and clarity to your triggers.I wish someone would have told me that triggers aren’t proof your relationship is broken, but that they’re invitations. Every time you’re activated, your nervous system is pointing to an old story: I’m not safe, I’m not loved, I’m on my own. What if instead of demanding your partner to fix it, we asked ourselves: what part of me is being reactivated, and how can I meet that need myself? The moment you start giving yourself the safety, love, or validation you’re seeking, your triggers shift from enemies to guides.🌟 Special Podcast Listener Offer: Join the Codependency Alchemy Membership today and get 40% off!→ Click here to claim your discount and join now!💬 Get Community Support: Join our vibrant, supportive chat community and get real-time guidance on your healing journey. → Join the chat✨ Free Shadow Work & Inner Child Guide: Ready to deepen your healing with a step-by-step guide?→ Download my FREE guide🎥 Watch 9+ Powerful Masterclasses: Access practical tools, guided exercises, and transformative teachings to help you heal codependency and build healthier relationships. → Exclusive Masterclass Library✍🏾 From My Journal: Intimate insights and reflections directly from my personal healing journey.→ Read my latest journal entries💎 Explore "The Gems": Browse curated free resources filled with practical wisdom and actionable insights designed to support your growth and healing. → Get your free resources here This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit alyssaaazander.substack.com/subscribe

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• Learning to choose yourself after a breakup

  Are you in the middle of heartbreak, doubting yourself, or terrified of being “too much” for others? In this intimate session episode of Codependency Alchemy, I guide a member through shadow work and inner child healing as she moves through fresh breakup grief, religious trauma, and the fear of disappointing others. Together, we uncover how old wounds show up in relationships, how to set boundaries with compassion, and how to finally choose yourself without shame.This episode is for you if:* You feel guilty for disappointing others or setting boundaries.* You’re in the messy middle of heartbreak or a major transition.* You often self-abandon to keep the peace or stay connected.* You’re ready to connect with your inner child and hear her wisdom.🌟 Special Podcast Listener Offer: Join the Codependency Alchemy Membership today and get 40% off!→ Click here to claim your discount and join now!💬 Get Community Support: Join our vibrant, supportive chat community and get real-time guidance on your healing journey. → Join the chat✨ Free Shadow Work & Inner Child Guide: Ready to deepen your healing with a step-by-step guide?→ Download my FREE guide🎥 Watch 9+ Powerful Masterclasses: Access practical tools, guided exercises, and transformative teachings to help you heal codependency and build healthier relationships. → Exclusive Masterclass Library✍🏾 From My Journal: Intimate insights and reflections directly from my personal healing journey.→ Read my latest journal entries💎 Explore "The Gems": Browse curated free resources filled with practical wisdom and actionable insights designed to support your growth and healing. → Get your free resources here This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit alyssaaazander.substack.com/subscribe

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