53 episodes
- Natalie Davis was a straight-and-narrow, rule-following lawyer mom who married her college boyfriend and fully expected to live happily ever after inside the white-picket-fence monogamy model.
Then her husband cheated—and eventually asked whether they could start having sex with other people.
What followed was messy, painful, liberating, awkward, sexy, and completely life-altering. Natalie is now the author of Saying Yes: My Adventures in Polyamory, a radically candid memoir about surviving infidelity, dismantling everything she thought she knew about marriage, and discovering a version of herself she never knew existed.
You know...like being a hot slut on a train.
In this episode:
Why Natalie never questioned monogamy before her husband’s affair
The humiliation of being cheated on—and why she couldn’t bring herself to tell her friends
How infidelity became an unexpected doorway into consensual non-monogamy
The difference between choosing polyamory and being polyamorous under duress
Why staying after betrayal doesn’t make someone a coward or a doormat
Watching your partner put effort into dates with someone else and realizing he never dated you that way
Why people are sometimes more comfortable with secret cheating than consensual non-monogamy
Natalie’s first swinger party
What swinging taught her about boundaries, desire, and speaking up
Falling in love with another partner for the first time
Coming out as polyamorous to family, coworkers, and her child
Why non-monogamous people still need legal protection from discrimination
The public-sex adventures that transformed a responsible lawyer mom into a hot slut on a train
Roadhead, parking-garage blowjobs, sexting, roleplay, and discovering what turns you on in your forties
Why consensual secrecy can deliver the thrill of cheating without the betrayal
Natalie’s current liminal dating era
What it’s really like living in a resident V with her husband and metamour
The difference between a V and a throuple
The difference between a living arrangement that feels peaceful and one filled with constant low-level tension
Why relationships don’t have to last forever to have been successful
And why Natalie’s story isn’t finished until she’s dead
READ SAYING YES: MY ADVENTURES IN POLYAMORY:
Bookshop.org: https://bookshop.org/shop/happyslut
FOLLOW NATALIE DAVIS:
Website: https://nataliedavisadventures.com/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/nataliedavisadventures/
Medium: https://medium.com/@nataliedavisadventures
Polyamory Today: https://medium.com/polyamory-today
LEARN MORE ABOUT OPEN:
Organization for Polyamory and Ethical Non-monogamy: https://www.open-love.org/
SPONSORS:
Become a more skillful lover with Kenneth Play’s Beyond Satisfied Pro course. Get $50 off at:
https://kennethplay.com/happyslut
Get 15% off FirmTech’s innovative sex-tech products at:
https://myfirmtech.com/ --> Use code HAPPYSLUT at checkout.
Get private, nonjudgmental sexual healthcare from Shameless Care, including DoxyPEP. Save $15 at:
https://shamelesscare.com/ --> Use code HAPPYSLUT at checkout.
SUPPORT THE SHOW!
Substack: https://samiamounts.substack.com/
Samia’s Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/samia.mounts/
Happy Slut Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/happyslutcast/
Happy Slut TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@happyslutcast
Happy Slut YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@happyslutcast
If this episode made you wonder what other versions of yourself might be waiting to emerge, send it to the responsible, rule-following hot slut in your life.
xoxo,
Samia
Mentioned in this episode:
Get 15% off Kenneth Play's Beyond Satisfied Pro course at www.kennethplay.com/closeted
Get a 15% discount on all FirmTech products!
Use code CLOSETED at check-out. - Pinecones, this week I'm talking to JessJess — party producer, president of Mission Control, organizer with the Bonobo Network, and the woman behind Beyond the Rainbow Events, which throws some of the most thoughtfully inclusive parties in the Bay Area. She's also been non-monogamous since high school, survived a marriage that ended in a way I wouldn't wish on anybody, and rebuilt her whole life inside a community that actually showed up for her. This conversation is about kink and parties and rope suspension, but what it's really about is what it takes to believe you're wanted exactly as you are. You don't have to be kinky, poly, or anywhere near a play party for that one to hit.
In this episode:
How JessJess ended up with three boyfriends and a girlfriend in high school, plus a full safer-sex negotiation at seventeen
Why she and her husband said "open relationship" for years, because nobody had handed them a better word
What happens when the person you've loved for twenty years becomes someone you don't recognize
Her first kink party: unicorn hair and a pink strappy outfit in a room full of black and red
Thuddy vs. sting-y impact play, and the scene where she discovered that her body talks
The femdom party where a man volunteered to be her footstool
What emotional play actually is, and how going into an insecurity on purpose taught her to feel jealousy in her body before reacting to it
Why tops sometimes need aftercare too
The sexy dinner party where she was the biggest person in the room and got more attention than anyone else
And how patriarchy sold all of us the lie that only one kind of body gets to be wanted — a lie that has cost every single one of us something
FOLLOW JESSJESS:
Beyond the Rainbow Events LinkTree: https://linktr.ee/beyondtherainbowevents
--> that link will take you to JessJess's events on Plura, Fetlife, and everywhere else
JessJess's Personal Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/dapperbetch
Beyond the Rainbow Events on Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/beyondtherainbowevents
SUPPORT THE SHOW!
Substack: http://samiamounts.substack.com
Instagram: @samia.mounts and @happyslutcast
TikTok: @happyslutcast
YouTube: @happyslutcast
Send this one to the friend who's been quietly wondering whether she's allowed to want more than one person. And send it to the friend who's decided nobody could want her at the size she is right now. JessJess has receipts for both of them.
xoxo,
Samia
Mentioned in this episode:
Get $15 off any order at Shameless Care using code HAPPYSLUT or use my affiliate link: https://shamelesscare.sjv.io/aNP1Xb - PINECONES I'M OVER THE MOON! Mina was my anonymous guest in episode 10 of Closeted, "My First Boyfriend Suffered a Lot Because My Sex Drive Was Too High." (Listen here: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/10-my-first-boyfriend-suffered-a-lot-because-my-sex/id1832942242?i=1000734016272) Back then, she was closeted, living with her parents, and maintaining a secret menagerie of lovers. Now, she's out of the closet and full of fresh, candid, tender, sexy updates - and holy hell, has she ever made CHANGES in the last two years.
In this episode:
The major family breakthrough that changed everything for Mina
When sex becomes an escape instead of a source of joy
Getting cut off by the friends she loves most - and how that led to her healing
Grief, loneliness, and hitting rock bottom
Graduating from her sexual mentor
The pressure to be the "perfect daughter"
Junk food men, emotional support trout, and slutty salmon
Getting rejected after perfectly fine sex—and being totally okay with it
Reopening her sexual HR recruiting department
Why starting a stand-up comedy career is a great way to get laid
Mina's very shy domestic slave/puppy
Bisexuality, kissing women, and spreading her bi wings
Finding her voice through stand-up comedy in South Korea
LISTEN TO MINA'S ORIGINAL CLOSETED EPISODE:
Episode 10: My First Boyfriend Suffered a Lot Because My Sex Drive Was Too High
https://podcasts.apple.com/bm/podcast/10-my-first-boyfriend-suffered-a-lot-because-my-sex/id1832942242?i=1000734016272
FOLLOW MINA:
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jungmal.mina/
Stand Up Seoul: https://www.instagram.com/standupseoul_official/
SEE MINA LIVE & SUPPORT NORTH KOREAN REFUGEES:
Stand-Up Comedy Show for Freedom Speakers International (FSI)
Saturday, August 22 | 8:00 PM
Taco Amigo, Itaewon
All proceeds benefit Freedom Speakers International, a Seoul-based nonprofit that provides English public speaking, mentorship, and career development to North Korean refugees.
Learn more: https://lovefsi.org/
Advance tickets: https://www.standup-seoul.com/event-details/charity-comedy-show-freedom-speakers-international
SUPPORT HAPPY SLUT:
Subscribe to Samia's Substack: https://samiamounts.substack.com
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/samia.mounts & https://www.instagram.com/happyslutcast
TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@happyslutcast
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@happyslutcast
Questions, thoughts, feedback, dreams and wishes: happyslutcast@gmail.com
Share this episode with the friend who's been fishing for emotional support trout in a pond full of slutty salmon.
xoxo,
Samia
Mentioned in this episode:
Get a 15% discount on all FirmTech products!
Use code CLOSETED at check-out.
Get 15% off Kenneth Play's Beyond Satisfied Pro course at www.kennethplay.com/closeted - One of the biggest things making a joyful sex life hard to cultivate in patriarchy is our collective acceptance of patriarchal beauty standards. These bullshit standards have convinced almost everyone that they're not sexy. IT'S A LIE, PINECONES, IT'S A DIRTY LIIIIIIIE. All sorts of bodies are sexy, all sorts of people are sexy, and there really is someone for everyone - but only if we are able to deprogram patriarchy's fuckery from our minds and see ourselves for who and what we really are. Fat rolls aren't gross and cellulite isn't disgusting. Wrinkles are not something you have to hide to be beautiful. These ideas are just the lies of patriarchal capitalism trying to make you think you need to spend money and starve yourself to be lovable.
Reality check: You are lovable RIGHT EFFING NOW. Listen to me read my Substack essay, You Can't Hate Yourself Thin, in this week's audio-only solo episode.
In this episode:
Why I went audio-only this week - I'm on a semi-real vacation visiting my mom for her 79th birthday!
The lie patriarchy teaches about which bodies are allowed to be sexy
Hitting my lifelong goal weight in 2019, and the fucked-up sense of "benevolent superiority" that came with it
The self-love weight-loss advice I used to smugly hand out like gospel *cringe*
How gaining the weight back spiraled into daily compulsive eating and shame
My New York trip, the naked mirror incident, and the moment my internal sex machine screeched to a halt
Growing up in a family that taught me to fear food and fat
The baloney incident — my earliest memory of learning fat was bad
The Atkins diet, the watermelon breakdown, and finally learning what hunger actually feels like
The relationship epiphany in my mid-twenties that unlocked real, fast, joyful weight loss
Crying into my ex's chest and realizing my "self-love" had a body-shaped asterisk on it
What I'm doing now to reprogram myself
Why the obsession with one "correct" body is patriarchy's rulebook, not the truth — and how we get free of it
SUPPORT THE SHOW!
Subscribe to my Substack: samiamounts.substack.com
Instagram: @samia.mounts & @happyslutcast
TikTok: @happyslutcast
YouTube: @happyslutcast
Send this one to the friend who's white-knuckling a diet right now, convinced that this time it'll finally fix how she feels about herself...and to the friend who compliments everyone else's body but never her own.
xoxo,
Samia
Mentioned in this episode:
Get 15% off Kenneth Play's Beyond Satisfied Pro course at www.kennethplay.com/closeted
Get a 15% discount on all FirmTech products!
Use code CLOSETED at check-out. - Amanda Dames, The Kink Consultant, loves helping couples struggling to reconcile a mismatch in their desires, specifically surrounding kink. She's a certified Somatica sex and relationship coach and certified sexologist who specializes in couples where one partner is kinky and the other one isn't, and the way she works with them will change how you think about asking for what you want, whether your fantasy involves rope or just finally being taken to a dinner you didn't have to plan.
In this episode:
- Why both monogamy and polyamory require partners to make sacrifices, and no one wants to talk about it
- Amanda's first coaching move isn't catering to the kinky partner, it's finding out what the vanilla partner actually wants
- Why "I don't have any fantasies" is almost never true
- The massage problem: why her ask and his ask are way closer than either of them thinks
- Porn vs. romance novels — both are erotic material, but only one gets made fun of by men
- Nine out of ten of Amanda's clients are husbands who want to submit (and her theory on why the dominant ones are all from New Jersey)
- Amanda's ten-session process with couples, laid out start to finish
- Why she thinks communication is NOT the most important thing in relationships
- The most freeing thing you'll hear if you're scared to top someone — they're already doing 90% of the work
- Subspace, dom flow, and finding your authentic dominant instead of playing a role
- Amanda gets real about her own jealousy, and says something out loud she never has before
- How patriarchy cuts men off from their vulnerability and women off from their power
FOLLOW AMANDA:
Join her free monthly group for women exploring their dominant side — email info@thekinkconsultant.com with a photo or social handle
Website: https://amandadames.com
The Kink Consultant Podcast: https://open.spotify.com/show/3psOpSZMQQYm2cN69bIKwc
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant
Join Amanda at Hedonism for Swinkation (use code TKC50 for up to $400 off): https://www.swinkation.com/
SUPPORT THE SHOW!
Subscribe to My Substack: https://samiamounts.substack.com
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/samia.mounts & https://www.instagram.com/happyslutcast
TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@happyslutcast
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@happyslutcast
Share this episode with anyone who's been sitting on the same fantasy for fifteen years, or with the partner who'd actually want to hear it if it came at them a little slower.
xoxo,
Samia
Mentioned in this episode:
Get 15% off Kenneth Play's Beyond Satisfied Pro course at www.kennethplay.com/closeted
Get a 15% discount on all FirmTech products!
Use code CLOSETED at check-out.
Get 15% off Kenneth Play's Beyond Satisfied Pro course at www.kennethplay.com/closeted
Get a 15% discount on all FirmTech products!
Use code CLOSETED at check-out.
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About Happy Slut
Happy Slut is your permission slip to want what you want, you cute little slut. Host Samia Mounts dives into sex, desire, and modern relationships with humor, honesty, and plenty of mischief. Through blazingly candid conversations and personal reflections, the show explores what it means to pursue pleasure, connection, and authenticity in a world full of mixed messages about all three. From navigating nontraditional relationships to unpacking shame and reclaiming joy, Happy Slut is about getting curious, taking ownership of your desires, and learning how to trust what feels delicious to YOU.
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