Marriage After God

Melissa Kruger, who oversees women’s initiatives at The Gospel Coalition, has been married to New Testament scholar Michael Kruger for 29 years and has raised three children who now love God’s Word. In this episode, she joins Aaron Smith to talk about what it really takes to pass faith on to the next generation, and why a Christian home alone isn’t enough. Melissa shares the breakfast-table question that helped her kids trust the Gospels, the simple prayer system her daughter still uses in college, and how to respond when your child voices doubts. For any parent who feels unqualified to lead their family in Scripture, this conversation offers a freeing reminder: aim for patterns, not perfection.

Grieving the loss of a child as a Christian couple: Matthew Efird, author of Even Though We Will, shares a dad's perspective on infant loss and what it does to a marriage. In 2019, he and his wife Hannah learned their second son, Noah, had trisomy 13, a lethal diagnosis, and in March 2020 they held him for 57 and a half hours before saying goodbye. In this conversation with Aaron, Matthew traces how the ordinary rhythms of faith, mentorship, and community they had built for years became the ground they stood on when the news came, and why everybody grieves, but not everybody mourns well. He shares the question their neonatologist asked about their marriage, the family slogan born out of the book of Job, and the two questions he and Hannah learned to ask each other in place of "Are you okay?" For anyone walking through loss or trying to love someone who is, it is an honest picture of trusting God when it hurts.

What is a grace-based marriage, and how do you stop keeping score with your spouse? Brad Rhoads, pastor, founder of the Grace Marriage ministry, and author of The Grace Marriage (Moody Publishers), spent the first year of his marriage convinced his wife's unhappiness was her problem, until two men in his church told him he was succeeding at the things that mattered least and failing at the things that mattered most. In this conversation, Aaron and Brad discuss the difference between a performance-based marriage, where love is given and withdrawn based on behavior, and a grace-based marriage built on the gospel. They cover why the church has largely abandoned the space between premarital counseling and marital crisis, how resting in God's grace changes the way you love your spouse, and what it looks like when a couple's marriage is so genuinely fun that younger couples come asking for counsel.

How your marriage affects your children: Jennifer Pepito, author of The Inspired Homeschool and host of the Restoration Home Podcast, has been married 36 years and homeschooled seven children for 30 years, but a clarifying moment came when her grown daughter told her what actually hurt growing up. It wasn't the hard circumstances. It was the conflict between her parents. In this conversation, Jennifer and Aaron walk through what chronic complaining does to a husband, how unresolved fear and disconnection create an atmosphere children absorb, and what it looks like to cultivate a joy-filled, thankful home in genuinely difficult seasons. They also make the case for homeschooling: why the public school standard was never the right measuring stick, and why parents who feel unqualified are closer to ready than they think. For any couple that wants to build something better inside their home, this episode is a good place to start.

Feeling disconnected from your spouse? Dr. Genee Francis, a licensed therapist and Assistant Director of Content and Programming for WinShape Marriage, has a reframe for every couple who says they can't communicate: it's not a communication problem. It's an intimacy problem, spiritual, emotional, and recreational. Married 18 years with two boys, Genee shares how she and her husband Rashad walked through his father's terminal illness, a two-year estate battle, and her unexpected hip replacement. In this conversation, Genee and Aaron talk through the prayer rhythm that gave her a window into her husband's grief when words failed him, why so many couples feel alone even inside a church, why naming disconnection out loud is the first step, and what it takes to build the kind of community that sustains a marriage through hard seasons. If you've ever felt disconnected and didn't know what to call it, this one is for you.