Peaceful Exit

When Nancy Howard Cobb wrote "In Lieu of Flowers: A Conversation for the Living" in the year 2000, she was ahead of her time. Little did she know that the cultural appetite for stories about mortality would only continue to grow, and that her book would be republished more than two decades later. In this interview,  Nancy explores the deaths of her parents, the loss of a close friend, and the shattering discovery of a marriage built on lies. She also tells Sarah why telling our stories of death and grief may be one of the most vital things we can do.

Death doula Darnell Lamont Walker, author of "Never Can Say Goodbye: The Life of a Death Doula and the Art of a Peaceful End," came to this work young. At just 12 years old, he sat with his dying cousin during the AIDS crisis. At 13, he helped classmates grieve the death of a friend. Darnell shares with Sarah how his grandma's fearless, open-hearted approach to death shaped those early experiences and everything that followed. He explains why grief doesn't have just one face: it can look like starting a garden, running a marathon, laughing hysterically, or crying at a red light. Darnell and Sarah also discuss their shared belief that adventure and creativity can be the ultimate antidotes to despair.

For more information on Darnell and his work, please visit his website: https://www.darnellwalker.com/

Anne Lamott is known for her piercing honesty, her humor, and her willingness to go to the hard places. She's the New York Times bestselling author of books like "Bird by Bird" and "Traveling Mercies," and she is, appropriately, so many people's favorite writer. In this conversation with Sarah, Anne explores the terrain that has defined so much of her life and writing: loss, grief, faith, and grace. She shares what she's learned from sitting with dying people, including her father and her best friend, and why she's well attuned to find hope - even in the darkest times.

For more of Anne's delicious writing, check out her substack: Hallelujah Anyway

Alua Arthur is a death doula and a New York Times bestselling author, most recently for her book "Briefly Perfectly Human." In this episode from 2024, Alua shares with Sarah what it was like fleeing Ghana as a child, and how she found her calling in an unexpected conversation on a bus. They also discuss the transformative nature of confronting mortality, why it's important to set boundaries in grief, and how to address people's natural fears during the dying process.

For more information about Alua's work, please visit www.aluaarthur.com, and follow her on social media @alualoveslife.

At the end of every episode of Peaceful Exit, Sarah asks her guests the same question: what does a peaceful exit mean to you? There have been many overlapping themes in people's responses, but so far no two replies have been exactly the same. In this compilation episode, we revisit the answers from our amazing season 6 guests: Dr. BJ Miller; Dr. Lucy Hone; Lisa Keefauver; Mary Roach; Jenny George; Kaleel Sakakeeny; Jessica Correnti; Carla Fernandez; Suzanne O'Brien; James Crews; and Dr. Deborah Kado. If you've ever considered how you might answer this question - what does a peaceful exit mean to you - please share your response with us! You can send an email to peacefulexitpodcast@gmail.com.